Human beings can be divided into two types: givers and takers. A successful relationship between the two requires finding the right balance.

Surely, two givers can have a happy life together. The giver-receiver relationship also works, but for different reasons. Givers want to see the smile on their partner's face when they bestow an offering on the one they love. Whether it's making him or her a sandwich or buying your loved one a car, the act of giving is pleasurable for the giver.

However, no matter how giving a person may be, no one can live by giving alone. We all need to rest and take in energy to survive. When your emotional well starts to go dry, it's only natural to turn to the one you love to help you fill back up.

Some couples have this wonderful habit of not only giving to each other but giving to the community as well. For many in a traditional relationship, the stay-at-home partner also volunteers for a cause they both support. If you want to contribute to the well-being of humanity, and you are working full time, it's great to be with someone who is representing your concerns and sharing in your ideals.

If you are with a giving person, consider yourself lucky and find a way to create an energetic equality with the person who is there for you. Even if you think things are equal, ask your partner what he or she thinks. It also is wise to remember that acknowledgement and appreciation are very important, even if never asked for.

Avoid getting caught up in who is giving more. Keeping score won't help you create a win-win for your relationship. People usually give to others in the way they would like to be given to, so figuring out how to give back to your partner should be easy. The other easy way to find out what he or she might need is to simply ask.

If you are in an unbalanced relationship or feel like you're being taken advantage of, start by looking at any habits that may have developed that enable this disparity. If you realize that either one of you has slipped into a role that is no longer comfortable, you need to say something, reach a compromise with your partner, and then actively change the behavior. Sometimes having the conversation is enough.

Just talk about how to create more equality or energy, whatever is required. The object is for both of you to feel good about what you give and are given.

— Dr. Barton Goldsmith, a marriage and family therapist, can be reached at 818-879-9996 or via e-mail at Barton@BartonGoldsmith.com. He has lived and practiced in Westlake Village for over a decade. Hear him live on KCLU Radio, 88.3 FM, from 1 to 2 p.m. Mondays.