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Neighbors urge shutdown of wedding venue
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STORY TOOLS 
More from CamarilloEvery time the wedding bells ring at Villa Amodei, one of the neighbors calls the cops with a noise complaint.
It's not the ringing — the bells are only figurative at Villa Amodei, a Somis-area home, orchard and wedding venue — but the noise of music and shouting, and cars coming and going on rural canyon roads. And above all, it's the fact that the owners of Villa Amodei don't have the permits that the county of Ventura demands to hold weddings and other events.
Since April, Jennifer and Ivan Amodei have been cited five times by the Ventura County Planning Division for holding unpermitted weddings at their home, said Chris Stephens, director of the county Resource Management Agency, which includes the Planning Division.
At least nine more weddings are scheduled through September, according to an e-mail the Amodeis sent to some neighbors this year, and the neighbors plan to report each and every one.
Pair have appealed fines
The Amodeis declined to comment for this report, and their attorneys did not return phone calls. Attorneys for Jennifer's parents, George and Debra Tash, who own the property, also could not be reached for comment.
The Amodeis have appealed the county citations and fines, and they have applied for the permits they need, although their application isn't likely to be processed until after the summer wedding season is over.
In their appeal, the Amodeis argue that the county ordinances covering wedding venues are capricious and arbitrary, and that the couple have a constitutional right to hold the weddings on their property.
Their neighbors in Balcom Canyon see it as essentially a declaration of war. Forty-two residents, representing most of the canyon's homeowners, have signed a petition urging the county to shut Villa Amodei down.
"They obviously don't care whether they have a permit or not," said Nancy Chapman, who lives a few properties away on Old Balcom Canyon Road. "What's going to stop them from having weddings even if their application is denied?"
Some neighbors had been friends for years with the Amodeis and the Tashes. Now hardly any of them are on speaking terms with the two couples. They've taken to videotaping the weddings to document the alleged permit violations, and to calling the Sheriff's Department to complain about the noise from nearly every wedding. In response, the Amodeis have hired security guards, who stand at the property's front gate to discourage trespassing.
Won't ignore illegal activity
Villa Amodei held a few weddings last year, Chapman said, but the real conflict didn't start until February. That's when the Amodeis and Tashes gave some neighbors a schedule of the 14 weddings scheduled for this summer, to warn them and head off potential complaints.
It didn't work.
"They wanted us to turn a blind eye to this illegal activity, and we're not going to do that," said Norm Blacher, another Balcom Canyon resident.
About the same time, the Planning Division was reviewing the permit status of wedding venues across the county, prompted by complaints about unpermitted venues.
In April, the county sent letters to five venues, including Villa Amodei, telling them to stop holding weddings until they obtained permits. The four others complied, Stephens said.
The Amodeis did not, and they continue to keep a Web site that offers their home as a wedding venue. They've been fined twice, at $1,000 each, for violating county codes. They have not paid because they've appealed the fines to the Planning Commission, but they did put down a $2,000 deposit to file the appeal, according to county records.
The neighbors argue that the $1,000 fine is too small to be a deterrent, because every wedding presumably brings in thousands of dollars. For the past month, they've appeared repeatedly before the county Board of Supervisors to urge it to increase the penalties.
Stephens said the Planning Division is doing all it can. The problem, he said, is that fines are usually applied to an ongoing violation such as an illegal structure. In a case like that, the property owner can be fined $1,000 every day.
"The wedding situation doesn't really fit the mold," he said. "It's a one-time violation, so there's a fine for every time they hold an event, and that's not as significant (as a daily fine)."
The neighbors' demands to shut the weddings down also can't be met, Stephens said. That could happen only with a court order, and the matter would wind up in court only once the county has, in Stephens' words, "exhausted its administrative remedies."
"Our procedures go to great lengths to ensure that folks have due process and an adequate hearing, and to do that, we have to take some time," he said.
The worst consequence for the Amodeis could be the effect the violations have on their application for a venue permit.
They have asked for permission to hold a maximum of 60 events from May to September, said county planner Drew Madrigal. The application is on hold because the county has asked the Amodeis to provide more information about their property, he said.
When the application is heard, the county Planning Commission will consider the potential impact of those events on neighbors, traffic and the environment. It might also look at the Amodeis' current string of violations, Stephens said.
"I don't think it helps their cause," he said.
New legal argument
In late June, the Amodeis filed a brief outline of the grounds for their appeal. They accuse the county of violating their civil rights and the right to due process and equal protection under the law and allege the ordinance governing wedding venues is "vague, unintelligible, lacks specific criteria and is overbroad and therefore unenforceable."
The Amodeis' filing cites the First Amendment and the Religious Land Use and Institutionalized Persons Act, a federal law passed in 2000 meant to protect churches and religious groups from discrimination in local zoning laws.
Douglas Laycock, a professor at the University of Michigan Law School and an expert on the act, said it has never been applied to a wedding venue like Villa Amodei.
"My intuition is it would be a tough sell to a judge," he said. "It's not crazy, but it's a stretch."
The most common use of the act is to prevent zoning laws that specifically exclude churches from certain parts of town, Laycock said.
For the act to apply to them, the Amodeis would have to argue that the weddings are "primarily a religious exercise," he said.
Laycock, however, expressed shock when told the typical processing time for a wedding-venue permit is six months to a year. And other venues have waited much longer.
'Doesn't make a lot of sense'
One of the other venues that received a warning letter this spring was the Tierra Rejada Golf Club in Simi Valley. Mark Sellers, the club's attorney, said his clients were surprised to learn the same permit that allows them to hold golf tournament banquets forbids weddings.
"It just doesn't make a lot of sense," he said.
Sellers said he hopes to work the matter out soon with county planners, but he's disappointed the club still can't hold weddings — three months after it started trying to obtain a permit.
Stephens said Tierra Rejada should be able to hold weddings with only minor changes to its permit. For venues starting from scratch, the Planning Division is working on a new set of procedures that should shave the processing time down to four or five months, Stephens said. A property with neighbors who object, like Villa Amodei, would still take longer, he said.
"We want to smooth this out," Stephens said. "In Santa Barbara County, they have standards in place for wine tastings and other events, and we're trying to develop something like that."
Posted by lawson_wayne on July 11, 2008 at 7:55 a.m. (Suggest removal)
Drunk people leaving the weddings driving on Balcom Cyan Rd - the permits should be denied for this reason alone.
Posted by abbyjacks on July 11, 2008 at 8:55 a.m. (Suggest removal)
"Won't ignore illegal activity"
Please.... isn't there bigger fish to fry????
We let illegal aliens work our fields, rape our health care, burden our schools and increase our taxes. SO please give me a break!
Posted by 805m0mma on July 11, 2008 at 9:03 a.m. (Suggest removal)
driving on balcom is dangerous...however i have attended a wedding there and the home is a perfect spot for a wedding and it is beautiful.
Posted by DamnSkippy on July 11, 2008 at 9:32 a.m. (Suggest removal)
I guess the County could make a little $ and stick an officer out for DUI duty!
Is this really a noise issue or neighbors upset that someone is making trying to make a living? According to their website it's 30 acres! It's not like they are parking on other people's lawns! If it truly a noise issue then that can be addressed.
I don't approve of disrupting your neighbors and operating without a permit but 6 months to a year seems kinda long to wait. I don't see how operating without a permit will help their case either.
Posted by 805m0mma on July 11, 2008 at 9:36 a.m. (Suggest removal)
damnskippy-i was thinking that same thing, when i was there i can't recall even seeing a house that close by...i'm sure the noise may echo but to call the cops each time they have a wedding there may be a little overboard.
Posted by fungus on July 11, 2008 at 9:37 a.m. (Suggest removal)
If you drive on the 118 on the weekends, you can see the CHP picking people off when they come out of Balcom Canyon. The reveune from the DUI/DWI citations alone should more than make up for the permit cost.
Leave the property owners alone!
Posted by ebrockway on July 11, 2008 at 9:45 a.m. (Suggest removal)
Sound travels forever out there at night, especially mariachi music with lots of tubas, live country bands. I like the DUI trap idea though, the schedule for the weddings has been basically posted. Make it happen!
Posted by hotwildflower on July 11, 2008 at 9:46 a.m. (Suggest removal)
I don't think this article would be too good for business. I wouldn't want angry neighbors harrassing my friends and family trying attend my wedding. I'd simply find some place else.
Posted by BeaHappi on July 11, 2008 at 9:58 a.m. (Suggest removal)
hotwildflower...no kidding! Although I did check out the website and the place is AMAZING! Maybe my hubby and I can renew our vows there on our anniversary...ha ha. Just kidding Balcolm Canyon residents!
Bottom line is that they were told to stop and they haven't and so no wonder the neighbors are ticked off. I don't live out there so I have no idea how noisy it gets but all of the traffic would bug me too. I'm guessing that if you live out outside of city limits it's because you don't want, well...city traffic!
Maybe they should have a park and shuttle ride place somewhere in Somis. So that instead of cars going up and down the road, there are shuttles. Still traffic but less of it.
Posted by rjeremy on July 11, 2008 at 10:03 a.m. (Suggest removal)
I am sure they have a tax idea number and are paying taxes on the income. If not, I am sure the feds would like to have a venue at their site :)
Posted by mandynathan on July 11, 2008 at 10:22 a.m. (Suggest removal)
Did you ever look at it this way - it's their property, they should be able to have parties (or weddings) if they want.
Posted by tsetsaf on July 11, 2008 at 10:23 a.m. (Suggest removal)
Sounds like busy body neighbors. What type of complaints will they have when Moorpark completes the development of that new motion picture studio?
Posted by ru4real on July 11, 2008 at 10:24 a.m. (Suggest removal)
I am not sure I understand. What is illegal about having weddings at your property? What if its friends and family?
Posted by BeaHappi on July 11, 2008 at 10:37 a.m. (Suggest removal)
imagine33...I think the difference is that they are running this business out of their home, and with that goes an entirely different set of rules.
Posted by fungus on July 11, 2008 at 10:39 a.m. (Suggest removal)
ebrockway:
The DUI trap is already there.
I guess my statement was a little confusing.
Posted by ru4real on July 11, 2008 at 10:45 a.m. (Suggest removal)
So the problem because they are making money?
Posted by mare523 on July 11, 2008 at 10:52 a.m. (Suggest removal)
Who wants to be married in disgusting Somis anyway?! How much of a low life place can you pick?! Show some class, get married at the Beach or Santa Barbara.
Posted by BeaHappi on July 11, 2008 at 11 a.m. (Suggest removal)
mare523...I thought that too until I looked at the website; the place is incredible. Very, very beautiful.
imagine33...I think the problem is that none of the neighbors thought of this first! :~) I'm sure there is a noise ordinance, so even private festivities would have to wrap it up by 10PM or so. Again, I don't live there so I have no idea what the impact is to the other residents.
Posted by FedUp on July 11, 2008 at 11:09 a.m. (Suggest removal)
Some of the ranches in Somis are beautiful. and A LOT cheaper than SB.
the bottom line is, they are operating a business out of their home illegally at this time. they should be fined or punished accordingly.
The sound really does carry out there at night too. almost like the nearest neighbor is only a couple hundred feet away, and not several hundred yards.
Posted by lilmama on July 11, 2008 at 11:10 a.m. (Suggest removal)
They should have the proper permitting. It would stink to be their neighbor.
Posted by letg58 on July 11, 2008 at 11:27 a.m. (Suggest removal)
www.villaamodei.com
It's beautiful!
Posted by phoneman on July 11, 2008 at 11:36 a.m. (Suggest removal)
I read here that other venues have stopped. But my family and I just attended two weddings at other venues in Ventura County (that do not have these permits) in the last month. So the Planning Dept and Chris Stephens's comment is INCORRECT.
Why are THE OTHER VENUES not being targeted as well?
Posted by lilmamma on July 11, 2008 at 11:48 a.m. (Suggest removal)
People are complaining about weddings when there is a 50 percent divorce rate in this country.Weddings are fun and they have free booze lets party.
Posted by FedUp on July 11, 2008 at 11:52 a.m. (Suggest removal)
"free booze lets party."
and therein lies the danger of weddings in this particular area.
divorce rates are at 50% because too many people have kids before they get married. they have no idea if they even like their partner before knocking them up.
ok, I am off my soap box now.
Posted by star on July 11, 2008 at 11:52 a.m. (Suggest removal)
So the Star publishes a story about ultrarich people holding weddings at their mansion, and how it upsets their neighbors. And the second comment is somebody screaming about illegal aliens. Gotta love it.
Posted by cynstriss on July 11, 2008 at 11:57 a.m. (Suggest removal)
The Amodeis family is just another example of those among us who feel the laws are for everyone but them. If they are willing to break the business laws, what other laws are they willing to break? Are they serving alcohol to minors? Are they paying taxes on this income? I'm not saying that they are doing these things, just wondering.
No matter how beautiful the venue, I would not do business with people who break the law. I would not risk my event being broken up by the police as an unlawful, non-permitted event.
Posted by Relvd98 on July 11, 2008 at noon (Suggest removal)
star...you said, just gotta love the combo!
Posted by gidget on July 11, 2008 at 12:08 p.m. (Suggest removal)
I am a Balcom neighbor and I'm fed up.
County Enforcement doesn't work nights/weekends. Neighbors were advised that our only option was to collect and provide the authorities with evidence that these events were taking place. WE HAVE NO RIGHTS of our own in the court and are totally at the County and Amodei/Tash's mercy...neither have shown us much so far. We are STUCK until the County does its' thing...which might not happen in my lifetime. If approved, the permit is good for 10 years. If Amodei/Tash won't abide by rules now, why would anyone think that they'd follow the conditions of their permit if approved. Tash owns the Hartley Gardens property at the corner of 118/Balcom (less than a mile away)and as the property owners, hold a permit for weddings there. Enough is enough.
Efforts to bully and intimidate have been made against me personally and to other neighbors to discourage us from formally opposing the CUP application. I don't scare easily and I will not be deterred. Guards at their gates to discourage tresspassing? PLEASE...spare me.
I didn't know a wedding venue was in the works nearby when I bought my property and knowledge of that fact would have nixed the deal for me. I commute 100 miles roundtrip daily for work and weekends are all I have to enjoy peace and quiet of my ranch. These events are scheduled for EVERY weekend through mid Sept. The mess starts early in the afternoon and goes past midnight at times.
I have absolutely nothing against weddings per se (or the people involved) but Weddings for family and friends are one thing...FOR PROFIT AT MY EXPENSE is another matter entirely. Per the event rental agreement I've seen they are charging approx $8,000 rent per wedding (plus they make a profit on the catering and other services)...do the math...that's well over $100,000 profit (after inposed penalties and fines) for events scheduled for these few summer months alone.
Maybe I should just join the club and open my property up for weekend music concerts and swap meets...The Amodeis and Tash's could advise me about how to circumvent the rules....but they'd probably want a piece of the action.
Posted by phoneman on July 11, 2008 at 12:17 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Interesting Gidget? What if you accidentally video-tape a family and/or friend party they are having? Can't you get in trouble for that? I never heard a person can't have a party at their home even for a friend. I have parties all summer with my family and friends and my neighbors all come over. Its lots of fun.
Posted by FedUp on July 11, 2008 at 12:20 p.m. (Suggest removal)
star - they were making a point that there are more important issues than this particular case. they were not using that post as a way to deter the conversation at all. everyone was ok ignoring it, until now.
Posted by 805m0mma on July 11, 2008 at 12:23 p.m. (Suggest removal)
mare523-and you're from moorpark?? is that is any better? don't bash the place until you have seen all the beautiful home in somis...
Posted by SCfan01 on July 11, 2008 at 12:33 p.m. (Suggest removal)
They have been having weddings there for a long time? Why is this such an issue now?
Posted by gidget on July 11, 2008 at 12:46 p.m. (Suggest removal)
phoneman-do you charge your family or friends for parties at your house and make money from them? Do you advertise the availabilty ane willingness to rent our your home for weddings on the internet? Aren't your friends and family already familiar with your home and know how to get there?
The video taping referred to is being done from accross the street at the entrance gate so that the volume of traffic and activity can be documented...that's it! At no time has anyone set foot on Villa Amodei property.
Posted by gidget on July 11, 2008 at 1:02 p.m. (Suggest removal)
oldoxn01 I've lived nearby for a few years...there were a couple weddings last year in 07, but I thought they were indeed for family...so what the heck...that was fine with me....but jeez...EVERY WEEKEND, ALL SUMMER????? The frequency is a big part of what has everyone so fired up.
My son got married at my place just months after I moved in....One son...one wedding! Our caterer asked if I would be willing to rent my ranch out for other weddings...I politely declined!
Posted by phoneman on July 11, 2008 at 1:08 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Gidget, it seems like you are mad because they are making money. To answer your question: YES, I collect money from my family. I'm not flipping the bill every time. We order barbeque or cater in and everyone chips in, gives me money and I pay for the food and drinks. Sometimes my brother pays the whole bill. Now I'm concerned I'm doing something illegal.
What I'm saying is I'm sure they have personal parties from time to time. If you have not set foot on their property, how do you know you are not videotaping a personal event of theirs?
I just looked at the website and the property seems large enough to not disturb anyone. Do they have onsite parking or is there parking all over public roads? Do cars have to pass your home to get to theirs? I'm not sure what you are mad about? I think its the money making.
Thanks!
Posted by BeaHappi on July 11, 2008 at 1:22 p.m. (Suggest removal)
phoneman...you and your family splitting the bill for a family gathering is not comparing apples to apples and you know it.
Gidget lives there so I'll take her word for it that these weddings are disturbing their "neighborhood." And currently they're holding these without permitting; basically just doing whatever they darn well please because they don't agree with the laws. That in and of itself is irritating.
The thing is that if they become legally permitted to hold weddings...then what? The neighbors are obviously still going to oppose the traffic and noise.
I'd hate to be this miserable in my home that I paid a pretty penny for. I know that ranches out there don't come cheap.
Posted by gidget on July 11, 2008 at 1:36 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Phoneman- you aren't making a living off your family and friends...Consider 100 or 200 people at each event and they have 12 events...that's a few THOUSAND people. Doesn't sound like the same as your family events. This is a BUSINESS! A wedding there for 125 people costs about $40 or $50 THOUSAND Dollars...Man, that's a lot of BBQ
The newpaper article referred to an email to neighbors...I saw the email Jennifer Amodei sent an email to a neighbor back in February listing the dates of weddings that had already been contractually booked/confimed...none were described as for friends or family.
YES...cars go by my entrance...One neighbor had to close her gate on Fathers Day even though she was having family over because of cars coming up their private road. Valets set off car alarms, horns honk, tires squeal, people hoot and holler...yea, a good time is had by everyone...and I get to hear it all.
Posted by phoneman on July 11, 2008 at 1:50 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Gidget,
I still didn't get my question answered. Do cars have to pass your home to get to VA?
I'm trying to understand your home in relationship to theirs? I live 10 feet from my next door neighbor. I can see in their kitchen window from mine. How far are you? 100 feet from house to house? What is it?
I just Google Earth "Villa Amodei" and its a big ranch. House can't be 100 feet from them. More like 1000's of feet if not in number of miles.
So how far are you from them?
Posted by Comments on July 11, 2008 at 1:57 p.m. (Suggest removal)
I think it's absolutely appalling that the county is allowing this to continue. I live in Simi so I'm not affected by this, but I feel so sorry for all the neighbors of the Amodei's. The Amodei's are clearly not neighborly and feel that they can do whatever the heck they want no matter how it effects anyone else. Sorry, the rules apply to all of us. How dare they ignore the law and how dare they continue to operate without a permit! How dare our lawmakers and authority figures accept them flipping the bird to them each and every weekend. What the heck!?
I don't give a damn if this is the most exquisite place to hold a wedding locally. So what? If the place doesn't have the proper permits and is not zoned for business then too bad. There's a HUGE difference between allowing a relative to use your home once for a family wedding (even if they pay for the wedding) and a BUSINESS operating out of a home holding events every single freaking weekend. I'm so glad I don't live near there, but if I did you can bet I'd be out there fighting just like Gidget. This is nonsense.
And, the golf club on Tierra Rejada is not an apples to apples comparison. At least it is a club, that has been zoned for business and has permits to hold other events. It is not a home and everyone who lives around the golf club understands that it's a CLUB, not a house. And even with that understanding the rep from the club said that they've put a stop to weddings until their permit is extended to include weddings specifically.
I hope that the Amodei's permit is denied and then I hope that the county goes after them to close them down for good. I agree that a $1000 fine is paltry and for them is just an overhead cost, likely built into the price of the event at this point. Isn't there a law against running illegal clubs, etc? Do they have a liquor license? If they continue to ignore the cease and desist orders until the permit issue is sorted out I'd demand their arrest. To heck with fines, throw them in jail for breaking the law.
Posted by FedUp on July 11, 2008 at 2:09 p.m. (Suggest removal)
"YES...cars go by my entrance..."
you obviously are not reading her posts. she answered your question.
if you were having a family gathering at your house every single weekend where 50-60 people were gathering, and were parking in the street and making noise until midnight, you can bet your butt that I would be peeved, and I would politely ask you to refrain from having these parties regularly.
like beahappi said though, try comparing apples to apples, and not apples to sharks. that is how far off your comparison is.
Posted by phoneman on July 11, 2008 at 2:12 p.m. (Suggest removal)
So what happens when they get their permit cause I think they will get it. It said they are in process.
What do you do then?
Posted by FedUp on July 11, 2008 at 2:19 p.m. (Suggest removal)
well then they are screwed!
I like the idea someone posted above about a shuttle service. since these are only weekends, I am sure a local business in town that does not operate on the weekends would not mind a little additional revenue to utilize their parking lot. as long as the VM people have a decent shuttle group, and make sure the parking lot is cleaned, it would be a win/partial win for everyone involved. you would still have your normal wedding noise, but you would not have the after party noise that tends to spill out of the area and cause disruptions.
what is another $2k in wedding fee's, when you are already spending $40 - $50k???
Posted by whatever on July 11, 2008 at 2:38 p.m. (Suggest removal)
gidget I feel your pain and I totally understand where you and your neighbors are coming from. The people on here who think what is the big deal, well ignore their lack of common sense. It shows how todays society is mememe. Noise can be heard very loudly when it travels. The horrible mariachi music alone would drive me insane. I hope you will get some sort of peace from the insane neighbors who obviously are clueless. Where ever you live you should not have to listen to other peoples music in the privacy of your own home. I do hope they do not get a permit and you all do everything in your power to stop them. Good luck.
Posted by BeaHappi on July 11, 2008 at 2:44 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Thanks FedUp - I came up with the shuttle service idea! :~)
Truly, if there is any chance that they will receive a permit, the Amodei's should do the right thing and work with their neighbors to find some ways to compromise. Things such as:
-A shuttle service
-Agreed upon 'dark' weekends (no weddings)
-Time limit - no noise after 10PM
-A party specifically for the neighbors, hosted by the Amodei's
-Night out coupons for the neighbors when there are events
"A man is called selfish not for pursuing his own good, but for neglecting his neighbor's." ~Richard Whately
Posted by FedUp on July 11, 2008 at 2:55 p.m. (Suggest removal)
seriously. Beahappi for President!
all of your ideas are always spot on. I need half the creativity you have.
Posted by phoneman on July 11, 2008 at 2:56 p.m. (Suggest removal)
It sounds like you want bribes. A very dear friend of mine is one of the officers that has visited the property, and he said he did not hear a thing when he got there or while he was there. Sounds like the Amodeis have been respectful! We don't know the whole story and neither do you.
Posted by mismel on July 11, 2008 at 2:59 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Has anyone thought about the wedding parties who are now stuck in the middle is battle between Amodei's and the neighbors?
What do you suggest the wedding parties scheduled through Sept 2008 do?
Posted by Comments on July 11, 2008 at 3:04 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Mismel - I did think of them. The 1st question that came to mind was whether or not the Amodei's were upfront with them about the lack of appropriate permits. If so, then while I might feel sorry for the wedding parties, I also feel like "tough luck." If they weren't aware of the situation then it's really unfortunate for them and I hope they sue the heck out of the Amodei's. No, it doesn't resolve their issue now, but if any of them are reading this hopefully they're scrambling right now to find an alternative venue. I know for a fact that if I were planning an event there in the near future that I'd be getting out of my contract right now and signing on with someone else. I don't suppose that there's much help for couples planning weddings in the next few weeks, but other than that I wouldn't feel very sorry for any couple who understands the potential of what could happen (i.e. the place could be shut down, the police could raid, etc) and doesn't do anything to change things. No way would I want to be in the middle of that mess.
Posted by BeaHappi on July 11, 2008 at 3:06 p.m. (Suggest removal)
"A very dear friend of mine is one of the officers that has visited the property..."
Rule #1 - when the police show up, shut the hell up!
I posted a couple of times that I don't live there...so I don't know the impact to the neighbors. But gidget does live there and she gave us first-hand information about what it's like to have a wedding factory in your neighborhood.
My primary point is that if it were me with the gorgeous property that was suitable for a wedding business, the FIRST thing that I'd do was make sure all was right with my neighbors.
Why would you want to have enemies living so close that they could negatively impact your wedding facility? If they got irritated enough, those neighbors could really alter the wedding experiences.
Posted by gidget on July 11, 2008 at 3:12 p.m. (Suggest removal)
phoneman- if Amodei get their permit approved, I'll pray that they follow the rules as conditioned in their permit....but I'm not optimistic that they will stay "in bounds". Hartleys continually break their CUP rules...like no events on Friday nights due to rush hour traffic (as an example of a "rule") and the County is clueless. Until recently, neighbors didn't even know this was a violation!
If Amodei don't follow the rules, we Balcom folk are screwed...the County will not be there to monitor their conduct or enforce on violations...and Amodei/Tash already know the County is all hat and no cattle....all bark, no bite...etc.
I suspect Amodei will do whatever, whenever only with even less restraint than they demonstrate now. That's a bleak thought.
Posted by phoneman on July 11, 2008 at 3:19 p.m. (Suggest removal)
BeaHappi,
You don't get it. Cops would probably listen for a while before they approach the person allegedly making the noise. No body knows when the cops are showing up. That's the point. You should talk to a cop first before you speak without proper info. A noise disturbance call a neighbor makes doesn't generate a phone call to the party being complained about that they are coming to investigate. That's crazy.
So if the cops show up and its quiet, then its quiet. Maybe the neighbors are pissed and are using Noise Disturbance calls as a way to vent their frustration. Eventually, the cops will have a little talk with the neighbors complaining about nothing and may fine the neighbors for crying wolf too many times.
Posted by ru4real on July 11, 2008 at 3:24 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Gidget, I live in an apartment, my neighbors are on the other side of the wall. How far away do you live from the Amodeis?
Posted by JohnAlamillo on July 11, 2008 at 5:11 p.m. (Suggest removal)
I have been to Gidgets home and can say she is not next door to the Amondeis.
Sound out there travels. An owl can be heard a 1/2 mile away and the coyotes for miles. This is not Main street this is a ag/horse area.
I have other friends that do weddings on their ranch. They have no neighbors and have tried to comply with the county ordinance. Its not easy. As my friends have done I hope so will the Amondeis.
Posted by sparks240 on July 11, 2008 at 6 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Wait until they start having same-sex weddings. You will have a bunch of drunk homosexuals unleashed on the populace!
Posted by SandandSurf on July 11, 2008 at 7:36 p.m. (Suggest removal)
As a Balcom Canyon neighbor, I would like to make absolutely clear that our opposition is NOT about anyone being upset?? jealous??? that the Amodei’s are “making money”. There are several very well run and well known (in their field) businesses in our neighborhood, and as far as I know, no one has had any issues with them.
In fact, Jennifer Amodei used to run a hair salon at her residence - "Salon at the Villa." It wasn’t a problem.
This is about a type of business that is NOT compatible with the families who have made this neighborhood their home. While the events may be “weddings” . . . . pretty bride, happy families, cake, kiss kiss . . . . it is equivalent to having a night club in our backyards. There is an enormous influx of cars (150+) all arriving within a short time period, there are “loud speaker” announcements and banter, a band or dj providing music, dancing, screaming, eating and drinking. Then the majority of the participants all leaving (again) within a short time period.
And let's not forget to multiply all that by 2 . . . since Hartley's, another event/wedding business owned by the Tash's, is a mere mile and a half in the other direction.
All happening during our valuable and greatly anticipated weekends and weekend evenings . . . . . . when we should be able to enjoy our homes and our families without the disturbance of an ILLEGAL business down the street.
The short term financial gain of one business and one family should not take precedent over the long term investment that 42 other families have made to be able to safely and peacefully live in this neighborhood.
Posted by ironwoman on July 11, 2008 at 7:39 p.m. (Suggest removal)
It's really sad when your own neighbors have complete knowledge of what is going on yet continue to do the act. This is called disrepect.
I say keep calling the police, keep monitoring the area and don't let them get away with it. If they were decent people, they would just stop.
If they don't have a permit, do they have a permit to sell alcohol? Is there a rule on that?
Posted by Llollolla on July 11, 2008 at 8:25 p.m. (Suggest removal)
I am surprised that no one has touched on the subject of the County advocating and instructing the BC neighbors to use the Sheriff's Department to help document and monitor what they already know to be an illegal operation.
What is the financial/taxpayer cost of each sheriff "visit" to Villa Amodei????
And god knows if I or one of my loved ones needed urgent and dire help, and a sheriff was delayed because he was at Villa Amodei for the second or third time that same evening because they refuse to shut down their - I'll say it again - ILLEGAL business, there would be h*ll to pay.
Posted by capt_jack on July 11, 2008 at 8:31 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Just go to Vegas.
Posted by shoeless_joe on July 11, 2008 at 9:17 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Give me a break.
The Amodei's are appealing on the platform that their "constitutional rights" are being violated.
I wonder when that happened - when they opened their business without the proper permits?? Or when they signed legal contracts and accepted money from unsuspecting brides and their families?? Maybe it was when their illegal activity disrupted their neighbors quality of life???
This is a perfect example of a criminal pulling out the victim card when caught.
I hope they go to jail
Posted by Shearluck on July 11, 2008 at 10:05 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Jail would be fun, Intersesting how WELL BEHAVED and neighborly the Amodei/Tash families were, until they discovered, their scheme to bamboozle the neighbors into going along with their wedding business was politely declined. Phoneman, you worry me. Feel free to provide your contact info. You can join the neighbors for, yet again, another wasted weekend of providing the county with evidence of another illegal wedding. (These are not private family events.) The audio and video of all past events demonstrate this quite nicely. What used to be a really great place to live, has gotten quite unpleasant thanks to two families. The Amodeis, and the Tashs. Shame on them.
Posted by missy805 on July 11, 2008 at 10:09 p.m. (Suggest removal)
I have a friend who got married there recently and she said that they are waiving the site fee on all weddings right now. So to those of you who think that the neighbors are Jealous of the money, well your wrong... The Amodei's are actually not making any money right now and that serves them just right.
Neighbors... Keep up the great work. No one should interfere with your peace and quite in your own home.
Posted by Praying on July 12, 2008 at 1:07 a.m. (Suggest removal)
Go Amodei's your place is beautiful. I went on line to see it. Hartley's is beautiful to. You will get your permit. The county loves weddings and if Hartley’s is permitted then there is no reason you won’t get your permit.
What a joy to have places that change couples life’s forever.
www.villaamodei.com
www.hartleybotanica.com
Posted by hope03 on July 12, 2008 at 8:45 a.m. (Suggest removal)
people have weddings in there back yards all the time.The people who keep calling the police should be charged money for making the police come out there for nothing.The police dept has better things to do.Like save lives make the city a safer place for us to live.We are lucky that we live in a country where we have freedom to do alot. The neighbors need to get a life and be thankful for what thay have.
Posted by Comments on July 12, 2008 at 9:12 a.m. (Suggest removal)
Er hopeo3, the police are charged with enforcing the laws. The Amodeis are breaking the law - every freakin weekend! Keeping peace and order is part of the role of a police officer, not only saving lives. This situation has huge potential to blow up as frustrations rise and tempers get out of control. It's absolutely right that the police are being called. If you want to be angry at anyone, how about being angry at the beauracracy that hasn't made a decion about the permit? How about being angry at the Amodeis for flagrantly ingnoring the law and basically flipping bird to all of the neighbors every weekend? How anyone can defend these people is beyond me.
Posted by SandandSurf on July 12, 2008 at 9:17 a.m. (Suggest removal)
We were all minding our own business and having a very nice life (thank you!) before the arrogance and the false sense of entitlement of this one family.
I assure you - NO ONE likes calling the Sheriff's department - but that is EXACTLY what we were told to do by both the County officials and by the Sheriff's department themselves.
Aim your ire (and judgement) where it belongs - at the people who are conducting the illegal and fraudulent behavior.
Posted by Shearluck on July 12, 2008 at 11:35 a.m. (Suggest removal)
Hope and Praying, You two should get together with Amodeis and Tashs, (or have you?) You could try to do some damage control for both of their wedding sites. Perhaps you can do referals for Sherwood or Four Seasons. Both would be beautiful facilities to make happy brides. I am certain they will be thrilled to make their facilities available (as they do have permits) for all these weddings the county so loves. I hope the Sheriffs Dept. is able to send Amodeis and Tashs a nice big bill, for all the time they have to waste on an an illegal wedding site. Hope03, get us your info and we will send the happy bride getting married tonight to your place for the party. Then we can all get some sleep.
Posted by Shearluck on July 12, 2008 at 7:47 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Hey everyone, Come on out to Villa Amodei tonight for the (not a wedding) complete with mariachi music and everything else you can imagine. Yet again, doing the county of Ventura's job on a Saturday afternoon/evening with video in hand. I hope that (Hope03 and Praying) are having a grand Saturday, as we certainly are not. Perhaps you would like to host the after party?????? If, you are on the Tash/ Amodei team you are most likely having more fun than the neighbors this evening.
Posted by Llollolla on July 13, 2008 at 7:20 a.m. (Suggest removal)
Praying -
Why don't you take alittle more of what your taking, and go retreat to your "happy place" . .
And leave the blogging to those who contribute rational and relevant points.
Posted by ironwoman on July 13, 2008 at 9:59 a.m. (Suggest removal)
Hope03 and praying- I am sure that the neighbors are hoping and praying this will end soon.
As for people having weddings in their backyards "all the time"....really who? Are you talking about weddings in their backyard every weekend or one day out of the year? There's a difference.
** I still would like to know if they are selling alcohol without a permit.
Posted by celtcwrtr on July 13, 2008 at 10:21 a.m. (Suggest removal)
if i was their neighbor i'd be p.o.'d, no doubt about it. i'm familiar with that area; i've been boarding my dog in that canyon for years.
i'd probably set up large outdoor speakers and hook them to my computer/itunes & when there's a wedding reception/music going on i'd blast my own tunes. fight fire with fire, tit for tat, return bad neighbor vibe and all that. (instead of waiting for the county to actually do something while they slap them with minimal fines.)
Posted by Praying on July 13, 2008 at 12:29 p.m. (Suggest removal)
I’m so sorry if I made you upset. All I was saying was the places looked beautiful. Thanks for being so mean and nasty to me. That really confirms who you guys are. Sad that you have so much hate inside of you. You must of had hard lives. I can still have love for all of you and can have grace and compassion for you.
I would love to give you what I have and that is Jesus Christ. My Lord and savior. I will pray for you to have peace. In Jesus name Amen
.
Sincerely,
Praying
Posted by Llollolla on July 13, 2008 at 1:04 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Praying -
Once again, you have brought up irrelevant issues to this topic . . . . religion and Jesus Christ.
And thanks, but no thanks. You don't need to pray for me.
Posted by Comments on July 13, 2008 at 1:36 p.m. (Suggest removal)
I think that the neighbors have been trying to protest this in the right way. And, it seems as though they aren't being heard and aren't getting any satisfaction. I think at this point I'd resort to some tactics similar to what celtcwrtr mentioned, though I'd try not to ado anything unlawful either. If it were me I'd organize protests each weekend when a wedding is scheduled and I'd stand outside the front gates with obnoxious signs and chant loudly. I don't imagine that would be very good for business. I think it's time for the neighbors to start getting creative.
Posted by Praying on July 13, 2008 at 4:22 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Don't worry I am and I won't stop praying.
Posted by kelly13 on July 13, 2008 at 4:29 p.m. (Suggest removal)
I agree with AbbeyJacks...how can anyone say "we won't ignore illegal behavior" and live in a state that not only ignores illegal behavior but rewards illegal behavior. You can't have it both ways.
Posted by gidget on July 13, 2008 at 9:46 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Ordinance 4354 was passed by the VC Board of Supervisors on 12/5/06 and Sect 8114-3.7.4 in relation to enforcement penalties for violations says among other items in #(5) the culpability of the violator in causing the violation, #(6) length of time over which the violation occurs #(7) the history of past violations either of a similar or different nature, on the same or different property of the same ownership #(8) the cooperation of the violator in resolving the existing and past violations are all specifics that are to be taken into account in setting/enforcing penalties....I think Amodei/Tashs flunk on all of these factors and hopefully they get not only the book thrown at them...but the whole library, too!
Posted by Shearluck on July 13, 2008 at 10:35 p.m. (Suggest removal)
After observing the provacative and childish behavior of the Amodei/Tash clan and their bouncers(Who needs guards for private family functions?)it is clear to all involved they have no plans to do anything anything except use the bully pulpit to get their way. The music was LOUD again this weekend,though remarkably still when the sheriff arrived. Hmmm, how do you suppose that happens every time the sheriff is called? Could it be the grapevine from Hartleys to Villa Amodei? A straight shot up Balcom Canyon. Comments, you are correct. We have been trying to do this the right way. We did not go to the press, Jennifer Amodei did that. We continue to do as the county and the sheriff have instructed. Boy, this is really working out well for the neighbors. Perhaps the only thing we have not done of is pray. I am sending a prayer through to the D.A's office that the Amodei and Tash families get what they deserve. As Gidget said, the entire library thrown at them.
Posted by Praying on July 14, 2008 at 3:02 a.m. (Suggest removal)
Shearluck I'm glad that you are praying because In the end prayer does work and God is faithful.
I'm praying that in the end of all of this. That if the Amodei's should have the permit or not have it. That there would be peace again in your neighbor hood.
Praying always and forever even now at this late hour
Posted by santabarbarasand on July 14, 2008 at 7:40 a.m. (Suggest removal)
It's a difficult situation and I'm glad that I'm not on either side of the fence! On one hand, the locations are gorgeous for weddings and I do think that they are utilizing them in a good way. On the other hand, the receptions are obviously loud and running too late into the night and that is extremely distressing to the neighbors. Nobody is compromising and that's the problem!
I can't afford to live on a ranch but if I could afford it I know that part of the draw would be the quiet. If it was me living there I could compromise if the weddings were only held on one weekend day and over by 10. I also think that the shuttle idea is great because it would cut down on potentially inebriated drivers on the road. More traffic means that the road needs repair more often and also it increases the risk of auto accidents on the road... I'd fight for that one and would hope that the city and the neighbors having the weddings would require that during weddings. Just allowing the wedding party to drive up, or ride up in limo's, would be ideal.
Some compromise needs to be made on all ends in this situation. If someone owns a ranch and they are a perfect wedding location and want to rent out their land to do that, they should have the right to do so. Imagine if a movie maker wanted to use one of the ranches for a movie... would the owner really turn down that opportunity? Yes I know it would more likely be short term but it would still be inconvenient! At the same time it would be a great experience and a good temporary use of your property. Your neighbors would need to be understanding and I bet they would be for a movie made on their street!
I live in close quarters with my neighbors and have some that think it is okay to have parties in their driveways (50 feet from my bedroom window) on work nights until 2am. Calling the police is always a frustrating experience because they say that "we have bigger issues to send our officers to" and really the only way to get them here is to call repeatedly or tell them that there are gang members at the party or a fight happening. "Gang members" and "fight" are terms that make the situation more urgent to officers. Perhaps you could try those?
Also, for those neighbors who were told by the city that they need proof of weddings... just give the city the link to the website! There are pictures there. In the meantime, those dates that the weddings are on could be good nights for your families to go do something or have a movie night.
Posted by kelly13 on July 14, 2008 at 8:03 a.m. (Suggest removal)
A couple of questions come to mind when I read this story. How close are the neighbors? If this estate is on 30 acres of land, the neighbors can't be too close. We have parties in the orchards around us or next door at the neighbors at least every other weekend. They get loud but I close my windows and turn up the tv.
It also said in the article that the Amodei's gave the neighbors a schedule of all the weddings. That sounds like they are trying to be considerate of the neighbors.
Posted by SandandSurf on July 14, 2008 at 8:38 a.m. (Suggest removal)
SantaBarbaraSand -
While I appreciate your diplomacy, why should any of the neighbors have to compromise with an illegal operation?? I shouldn't be forced out of my home . . . or have to alter my schedule because of a family who continues to ignore the law.
Should Villa Amodei finally obtain their appropriate permits . . . . well then, no doubt a "Plan B" will have to be determined. But until then, my family and I are not going to be bullyed into tolerating such disrespect for our lives and what OUR GOALS are for living in this neighborhood.
You mentioned filming a movie . . . we did have a movie crew on our ranch a few years ago. Proper permits were obtained, and the filming took place during traditional business hours (M-F, 8 - 6). It was short-lived, and no one was disturbed or inconvenienced . . . . the very reason why the permits were easily granted.
And please remember .. . . even if the weddings/events had NO NOISE / MUSIC, the neighbors are still instructed to call the Sheriff. This is an illegal, COMMERCIAL business.
To Hamskid, my neighbors (of course!) have private parties, and many go "long and loud". That's absolutely fine!! They LIVE here, and these celebrations are understandable and tolerated by all.
That's very different from having a commercial, for profit enterprise . . . . that in its current form . . . .is ILLEGAL.
Posted by ru4real on July 14, 2008 at 10:40 a.m. (Suggest removal)
Hey Gidget, looks like you are the kettle calling the pot black. How many violations do you have on your property, such as structures built without permits? Permits put in place to protect your neighbors and those on your property from fires, leakage, and fatal injuries. Serious and very real damage!
Posted by gidget on July 14, 2008 at 1:31 p.m. (Suggest removal)
hummm ru4real...
You seem to think you know a lot about me and my property...however, your allegations are not factually correct.
Since you brought it up and seem so concerned about public health and safety...check out the conditions of people and animals living on Tash owned properties around the county...
Posted by ru4real on July 14, 2008 at 1:57 p.m. (Suggest removal)
hmmmm … talk about not factually correct. Once again, I say, its the kettle calling the pot black, oh so very black.
Posted by santabarbarasand on July 14, 2008 at 4:15 p.m. (Suggest removal)
RunningL8, you need to make up your mind. Are you bugged because of the type of business or are you bugged because they do not have a permit? You're funny!!! I wish that this was all I had to complain about, seriously, I'm so jealous of your problems!
"This is about a type of business that is NOT compatible with the families who have made this neighborhood their home. While the events may be “weddings” . . . . pretty bride, happy families, cake, kiss kiss . . . . it is equivalent to having a night club in our backyards. There is an enormous influx of cars (150+) all arriving within a short time period, there are “loud speaker” announcements and banter, a band or dj providing music, dancing, screaming, eating and drinking. Then the majority of the participants all leaving (again) within a short time period.
And let's not forget to multiply all that by 2 . . . since Hartley's, another event/wedding business owned by the Tash's, is a mere mile and a half in the other direction.
All happening during our valuable and greatly anticipated weekends and weekend evenings . . . . . . when we should be able to enjoy our homes and our families without the disturbance of an ILLEGAL business down the street."
and then later you said:
"Should Villa Amodei finally obtain their appropriate permits . . . . well then, no doubt a "Plan B" will have to be determined. But until then, my family and I are not going to be bullyed into tolerating such disrespect for our lives and what OUR GOALS are for living in this neighborhood."
Posted by SandandSurf on July 14, 2008 at 4:42 p.m. (Suggest removal)
SantaBarbaraSand -
Sarcasm doesn't become you, and quite honestly, I think my comments have been fairly articulate, and that it's pretty clear that I'm "bugged" by both . . .
Villa Amodei does not have a permit, has not completed the process to become legit (which a neighborhood hearing is part of), and the County allows this illegal business to continue.
And absolutely, it is the "type of business" . . . . for all the reasons that myself and others have stated. You have conveniently left out my reference to the half dozen other businesses in our community that function quite well and successfully within our neighborhood.
Regarding this being the "only thing I have to complain about" . . . .whether it is or isn't my "only problem" doesn't change the facts.
Posted by Shearluck on July 14, 2008 at 5:10 p.m. (Suggest removal)
ru4real, you are way off topic. frankly your tone sounds rather threatening. when did we get to anything other than the illegal non permitted amodie/tash weddings? who in their right mind thinks for one second those families would follow county rules and regulations? they do not do it now, clearly that means to any right minded human there is no compromise. they tromped on that happy thought 2 years ago when they started advertising with no intention of following any rules. (other than the rules in the villa amodei contract, collecting checks from brides.)
Posted by shoeless_joe on July 14, 2008 at 5:33 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Riddle me this, santabarbarasand
Why should the neighbors tolerate and accept this illegal (nonpermitted) business that disrupts, interferes, changes and minimizes their quality of life?
Posted by Comments on July 14, 2008 at 5:51 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Really Santabarbarasand, why should the neighbors put up with this illegal activity? Just because you think you have it worse off doesn't mean that others aren't allowed to try and effect changes in their lives. If you're bothered by things in your life take a stand instead of telling others they have no right to complain since they don't have it as bad as you do.
Posted by Caring1 on July 14, 2008 at 6:55 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Dear Neighbors,
I have known this family for longer then 30yrs. Their hearts are nothing but kind. They are giving people and loving. They have helped so many. I’m in fact confident that they have even helped many of you. They have talked about many of you with joy and thankfulness. They have been so happy to live in such a wonderful community. They have always been upfront with you. Not because they had to be but because they care about you. They have always been willing to comply and work with you. They never did this with any evil behind them or wanting to make you feel the way you do.
Let me tell you a little about Jenifer Amodei she is kind and loving. She lights up a room wherever she goes. She is talented in so many ways. Ivan is full of joy and laughter. What brings him the most joy is making people laugh after a hard day. They are kind loving people. They would be there for you in the drop of a hat. I’m sure that when their side of the story comes out things will be sorted out.
Sincerely,
Caring1
Posted by santabarbarasand on July 14, 2008 at 7:26 p.m. (Suggest removal)
lol. I thought my first post was considerate and took into account both sides of the issue. Then when my well thought about opinion was attacked it really made me see how lucky these guys are that this is the issue with the area that they live in. I didn't say anything about them not having a right to try to make utopia even better, on the contrary, I said I was jealous.
It's topics like these that show how fortunate some people are that this is an issue that people actually have energy to pursue. Does it make me laugh that this is something causing so much stress to the neighbors? YES! It's weddings for goodness sakes, not a crack house! I hope that these guys can figure it out and get along... it will take COMPROMISE for sure, as all neighbors need to do with each other.
It's just life and life is short. You learn this when you watch those you love slowly die. I guess that's why I am laughing... because I have learned the hard way that stuff like this situation are nothing in the scheme of life. I guess instead of being jealous, I should feel pity... but I don't, I'm jealous. Not for the reasons that seem obvious either, more because you all have the freedom to be selfish.
Posted by santabarbarasand on July 14, 2008 at 7:40 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Comments... I didn't say that they don't have a right to try to change things. As with most conflicts, I think that there are probably better ways to resolve it than by publicizing it in the news. It IS a great way to get their neighborhood more attention and to give people a cause to fight for. Many people need a cause... sometimes it just doesn't seem as worthy as others. Who am I to judge? I'm not really... I'm just jealous and yes, still laughing!
I think about how if these people put half of this energy towards something that really matters in this world that great things could be accomplished. I guess that battles like this provide more satisfaction in the short run though and I can understand that. Fighting world hunger seems so overwhelming and because it is not literally in most of our back yards, it takes a long time to see results... not even close to the type of gratification a good fight with the neighbors can bring!
The question is why am I interested? This has NOTHING to do with me and it matters not a whit what I say. I think that it is nice to forget MY problems for a minute and laugh about someone else's. Seriously, I'm NOT being sarcastic.
Posted by SandandSurf on July 14, 2008 at 8:10 p.m. (Suggest removal)
If my determination to preserve a home and quality of life for my family that took 40 years of hard, back-breaking work and sacrifice to build makes me "selfish" . . . then so be it.
Posted by SandandSurf on July 14, 2008 at 8:42 p.m. (Suggest removal)
And SBS a few more thoughts . . .
What could you possibly know about any of us and our private causes? Perhaps when this issue is finally settled . . . we'll chat, and I'll tell you about my years of work with food banks and abused children.
But what do my personal crusades have to do with this issue??
No one wanted this . . .we don't like spending our energy this way . . . . and I assure you, it hasn't been fun and it's not funny.
These our are homes . . . . our sanctuaries, our retreats, our safe places, our comforts, our dreams come true, and hopefully, our legacies to our children and grandchildren.
If this has been a source of amusement for you . . . well, glad to be of service.
Posted by SandandSurf on July 14, 2008 at 8:57 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Oh . . . . and regarding my professional life/career, I was in healthcare for over 20 years, and am a former vp for a company that provided health advocacy for families facing health care issues and crisises.
Posted by santabarbarasand on July 14, 2008 at 9:04 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Sorry RunningL8, normally I am more sensitive to sanctuary, honestly. And you're right, I don't know anything and I shouldn't judge you guys on anything EXCEPT for airing your issues so publicly. And that is my opinion, which again, I know doesn't matter. It is not my neighborhood so you should just ignore my opinion since what I say or don't say really has no bearing on your life.
It's been a hard week for me, my father is dying and I'm having trouble coping with it. Your situation makes me laugh right now and I guess it is just because it is the kind of problem I wish that I could focus on. There is actually an opportunity for a solution in your case, whereas mine has none. I apologize for venting my helplessness-caused frustrating on you. I actually came in trying to propose solutions because that is the way my mind works. In my experience there is usually a solution for every problem but right now, I have no solution to my father's illness. When you responded negatively I reacted in kind. Perhaps I was looking for a fight? It's been known to happen... fight or flight is such an instinctual response. I teeter between the two right now.
Anyways, don't take me personally. I didn't mean to discredit your hard work, or that of your neighbors (including those that own the marriage farm haha). I honestly AM jealous. I wish my problem had a solution but it doesn't. Most of the time I am able to accept that but this week I'm having a lot of trouble. I'm sorry that I took it out on you and your neighbors here.
Posted by ladydefinger on July 14, 2008 at 10:41 p.m. (Suggest removal)
santabarbarasand, thank you so much for your reasoned and very articulate commentary. Be assured it has been most welcomed. And also be assured that my heart goes out to you now. I lost my mother five years ago, a long and very painful death, both physically and emotionally. You have no need to say you're sorry for speaking the truth. In the end, these squabbles are small and, to be frank, quite petty. Thank you for what you have written here.
Posted by santabarbarasand on July 14, 2008 at 10:49 p.m. (Suggest removal)
I've been caring for my father for almost 6 years now and it's getting close to the end. His care consumes much of my time and most of my thought. I distract myself with reading the news for some reason... maybe to try to see how others have worse things in their lives and to remind me to count my blessings. Unfortunately most things in the news are fluffy... topics that upset people but not of the magnitude that I live with right now. I like the distraction that serious discussions bring and this one had that potential until it got personal. I allowed it to go there though and that wasn't my intent. I don't feel sorry for what I said so much as that it obviously offended and upset a couple of people. They are dealing with an issue that is interfering with them having the peace they crave in their lives. My thought is "well it's just on weekends right? No big deal" but that's only because I have more pressing worries in my life right now. If I didn't have my father to care for, I would have the freedom to be more selfish (selfishness is not always a bad thing) and to fight about what I believe in. Right now I have no energy left each day to believe in much of anything.
Like I said, I'm jealous! That shouldn't be taken as an insult only for a truth. I've had people tell me that they were jealous of me before and it always baffled me but now I understand how you can be jealous of someone else, without wanting what they have. Does that make sense? It is about wanting what they DON'T have, the daily struggle of watching and caring for a dying father. And at the rate he is going I think that there is a good chance he will pass away over the weekend on my Birthday. I hope not but it is my biggest fear right now.
Posted by SandandSurf on July 14, 2008 at 11:24 p.m. (Suggest removal)
To santabarbarasand -
(and entirely off the issue of BC neighbors)
What you and your family have been going through for many years now is truly a heartbreaking and exhausting journey, and you have my sincere sympathies.And if I may offer some unsolicited counsel . . . . what I have learned working with families under such painful and complicated circumstances is that you do need to take care of YOURSELF and make sure that you have some "time off" . . . you are no good to anyone so exhausted and stressed. There are healthcare professionals and organizations out there that can offer you some relief. Perhaps you can reach out to a trusted physician who can suggest where you can receive some much and deserved support? There are wonderful and caring resources out there . . . maybe a friend could help you find one???
I can't even imagine what you are going through . . . your father is lucky to have such a devoted and loving daughter.
Posted by Peaceful on July 14, 2008 at 11:27 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Wow... Santabarbarasand I hear your heart and it breaks for you. I hope your example and perspective will be heard. I hope it helps this neighborhood come together. They need to work this out.
From what I read it is a small issue blown way out. It just takes two sides to come together. I will be praying for strength to carry you in this difficult time. I pray that your father makes his way home safely.
I also hope for peace and forgiveness. For all of you in your hearts and neighborhood.
Posted by Peaceful on July 14, 2008 at 11:38 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Hello RunningL8
What you said to santabarbarasand. Was very kind and thoughtful of you. You seem like a very good person.
I hope that you do touch the people around you with your words. I think the more you lean towards this part that is in you. The more peace you will have in this situation. That is around you.
I'm wishing the best for you and your family,
Peaceful
Posted by santabarbarasand on July 15, 2008 at 7:25 a.m. (Suggest removal)
I know my personal issues are completely off topic but I used them to illustrate where my point of view comes from. I spent many years as a counselor to abused children and although my childhood was rough, it showed me it could have been much worse! Same goes with things in society now... I live in a not so great neighborhood but I have a wonderful house and for a single mom, I'm pretty successful. Reading the news reminds me that although I don't always like my neighbors, it could be much worse, they could be shooting at each other! Or I could have been born in another country without the opportunity to support myself and my son as a single mother. There are a million ways that it could be a lot worse and where finding a solution to problems could literally be impossible.
That's what had me laughing, was how some of us have the luxury to be upset by things that can be worked out. Not to ridicule any of you... seriously, one of my goals is to purchase acreage and have my peaceful oasis, as so many homeowners in this comment section have done. I do respect that, I know it takes a lot of hard work to get to that point in life and you want to be able to just enjoy it. However other people enjoy themselves differently and when you live in a populated area you will ALWAYS have some issue or another. I hope that the neighbors are able to realize that in the scheme of life, although annoying, these are small issues that do have a solution. Don't let it become a war... it's not worth the stress!
Posted by santabarbarasand on July 15, 2008 at 7:44 a.m. (Suggest removal)
RunningL8, thank you for the suggestions. This has been going on for several years (6 years this week) and I have tried everything, including anti-anxiety medication, but really at this point I'm waiting for my father to pass away. I never thought I would ever want to see him go but seeing him at this point is gut wrenching and I look forward to it being over for him and for the rest of us. I take time for myself but those times I find no energy... I not only care for him but I work full time, am a full time student and also I am starting my own business... not to mention that I'm also a mom, stepmom and have a huge family otherwise. I just want to run away, a body can only take being in a high state of anxiety for so long before depression and physical issues start to come into play. I'm at that point! Unfortunately my role with my father is so well established and neccessary, nobody can fill my shoes. He depends on me and if I don't show up, he cries. I've been the only one he can rely on during this and I take that very seriously.
Hospice has offered me tons of counseling but I don't really have time to use them. They don't really help anyways because if I start to feel better about things, when I go see my father it turns all of that upside down again. I see him nearly every day so I'm on a constant roller coaster. I watched him nearly die a couple of weeks ago, he was so sick that we didn't expect him to make it through the night at times, and the Dr. thought we would lose him in a matter of just a few days after that so I sat vigil with him for 12 hours a day at least. He stabilized but will never improve... his disease is so unpredictable that they cannot even guess at how long he has, it could be days, weeks, months or years. In the meantime it is ruining my life, I can't go away because I am afraid something will happen while I am gone and he will be scared. He's still afraid to die, even though he is now totally bedridden and cannot even move his body except to barely move his fingers to respond to questions. Soon he will only be able to communicate by blinking his eyes.
So you see, there isn't time off from the crisis in my life. I am the one who gets the calls...and I cringe every time my phone rings! Eventually, maybe soon, it will be over and I will grieve but until then I'm helpless. Most days I can halfway accept that but not today.
I hope that sharing these things can help some people to appreciate their lives and to focus on solutions. I've always worked hard to find solutions and it is amazingly hard for me to be in a situation where there really aren't any. However, as US citizens we have so many opportunities to lead good lives and to help others, there are solutions to nearly every issue. As you can see, the best solution for me is to write about it! :) This isn't really the right forum but I wanted you to know I wasn't evil lol
Posted by stormcloud55 on July 15, 2008 at 11:49 a.m. (Suggest removal)
Wow, I've lived in Somis for 20 years and didn't know these two places existed. I'll have to give "wedding crashers" a try.
Anyone thought of parking a semi outside the venue and blaring the air horn?
Posted by Shearluck on July 15, 2008 at 9:17 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Hey caring1, i do not what load of b.s. you have been sold, but the tash amodei families have no room in their world for all the love, consideration and thoughfulness you mention. Come on out and take a look at the provacative rude behavior toward all the neighbors.(about 50 of us) That was a nice little p.r. piece you wrote, however I am afraid you are confused about the players you so eloquently gushed about. contrary to the line you have been sold, there is only one thing the tash/amodeis are interested in. getting their way, no matter who they hurt on the road to success. the only thing they have helped any of us with are peptic ulcers.
Posted by caring on July 16, 2008 at 3:44 a.m. (Suggest removal)
Dear Shearluck,
I’m sorry that you feel this way. You seem to be very mad and hurt. You seemed to really personalize what I wrote.
It’s just very hard for me to stand by while people bad talk about the Amodei/ Tash family and not say anything. This has nothing to do with P.R. Why would I care about that? This is just my heart. All I really care about is that there would be peace again for these family's including your family and everyone else involved.
I don't know how well you know these families. But I know them very well and they are defiantly what I said.
Sincerely,
Caring 1 about you to
Posted by fratres41 on July 17, 2008 at 8:13 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Wow! This debate just came to my attention. I rent my home from George & Debbie Tash and live on the same parcel next to the Hartley wedding site. I am sure that I am closer than any of the neighbors of the Amodei's and as such, I listen to wedding functions virtually every weekend. In a perfect world that served only me, I would not have to listen to the traffic on Balcom Canyon Rd, or my neighbors dump trucks running back and forth. I wouldn't hear the gunshots of target practice in the barancca, the drag racers on friday night, or be awakened when the wind machines turn on in the orchards on a frosty night. But alas, the world is about more than just me. I am an older retired man and like my peace as much as any and if I chose to, I could sit on my porch on a saturday night and convince myself that I am being dreadfully wronged by the Hartley weddings and enter into a conflict with them. The truth is however, Tash's spent a lot of time and money on that property to help the Hartley's have a source of additional income. Some of the above comments make it sound as though they personally are building a business enterprise for their own enrichment, which they hardly need. I can personally testify to their selflessness and practice of helping others. Prior to my retirement they built me a beautiful 1800 sq. ft. garage (without increasing my rent or any other payback) explaining that they thought I might one day want to retire and practice my trade on a reduced scale at home. This was not a simple metal building but a beautiful piece of architecture. This was only one of many ways in which they have expressed a caring and giving spirit to my family. If I hear some music and other sounds from the Hartley's, I am grateful that I have the opportunity to show them that they have caring neighbors who wish the best for them. The peace from that attitude more than offsets any loss of peace from the music. I am confident that the few people who stirred up so many of you neighbors to engage in this terrible conflict have cost each of you the loss of far more peace than the Amodei's have. I would challenge any of you to really think about this and go to the Amodei's and say, " you know, I have really let myself get carried away with this matter but having thought about it, my relationship with you as a neighbor is far more important. I just want you to know, that I appreciate your friendship and I will not engage further in this issue." You will be amazed at how good you feel about yourself. Take it from an old man who has gained a little wisdom over the years. Peace comes from within, not from without! I know how easy it is to take off on any matter in the wrong direction as I have done it myself. Believe me I am not pointing the finger at anyone. I also know that it is just as easy to recognize the error and correct it. Best wishes to all of you. Jerry Stone
Posted by caring on July 17, 2008 at 10:37 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Dear Jerry Stone,
I agree with you. Thanks for speaking the truth.
Caring1
Posted by mstone88 on July 18, 2008 at 8:13 p.m. (Suggest removal)
Wow! Finally, some one wrote something worth reading! We live in troubled times, with lots to worry about: our loved ones fighting a war overseas, a failing economy, struggles in politics... with all this, don't you think we've lost sight of what's really important? I'm so pleased to see the notes of Jerry Stone above, and to see that FINALLY someone brings to light all the wonderful things the Tash's and the Amodei's have done for us on a personal level, as well as for our community! It makes me sad to see that some of the people who are writing such vidictive things called on Jenny Amodei herself when she was younger to tend to their animals and property when they left town. And George and Debbie, who have kept their business local, boosting our local economny. People who have fought to preserve the safety and charm of SomisFolks, let's get our priorities straight, and remember what's important - not waste our precious time attacking good people! I'm proud to call the Tash's and the Amodei's friend, the same way I'm proud to call Jerry my dad!
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