Posted by OxnardNative on April 15, 2008 at 5:58 a.m. (Suggest removal)

SAD. I hear a lot of sad things in this story, not just the fact that this little boy is gone. Prayers to the family and whoever may have been involved. There are far too many young lives being lost in the Oxnard area these days. First EO Green, now this?! :-(

Posted by desdave on April 15, 2008 at 6:17 a.m. (Suggest removal)

What a shame. This tells the story of a kid starting down the gang road and paying the price of trying to be like the big bangers, regardless of if it was an accident or deliberate. Usually we read about them after they are older and either kill, die or go to prison. To read about a wanna be in the 8th grade dying is really a sad comment on that whole life style.

Posted by pjlove10 on April 15, 2008 at 7:46 a.m. (Suggest removal)

"Did not appear to be gang related.." Are you kidding me? A young boy, and yes, a little boy was killed. Whether he portrayed himself as a gang member, had ties, or family in gangs, it's pretty sad that it's not obvious to more people. According to this small article, all the signs were there. People don't get killed in this manner for no reason, epsecially a child. Very sad, my condolences to the family.

Posted by peterpan11 on April 15, 2008 at 8:06 a.m. (Suggest removal)

This is a really sad story but the fact is gang violence is sweeping the nation. I know that Bongiglio said it wasnt gang related but why else would a 13 year old get shot in the head in El Rio? Please! Plus people are holding up signs at the carwash that read, "Donation Carwash, R.I.P Jaime, AKA lil Vago". This nickname his mother didnt recognize. Yet another unfortunate thing that gang members and taggers often have nicknames that people dont know about. And if it was a family nickname (that I am sure some will say) than why didnt his mom know about it? I remember the car wash for the gang member shot and killed by OPD last year and the carwash was at the Circle K. Or the other homey killed the year before and the carwash was at the Vons. If it walks and talks like a duck, its probably a duck.

Posted by Relvd98 on April 15, 2008 at 8:15 a.m. (Suggest removal)

His mother apparently was clueless as to the lifestyle her son was leading; it's clear that he was or either associatd with gang members. Sign that was held up at the car wash read "Donation Carwash, R.I.P Jaime, AKA lil Vago," a nickname his mother didin't recognize.

Alot of the times the parents are oblivious as to what their kids are up to and what they do on their spare time. Sadly, tragic has struck a very young boy. I hope I'm wrong about this and maybe he was at the wrong place, wrong time. My heartfelt condolences to his family; hopefully enough money is raised for the funeral expenses.

Posted by rebel123 on April 15, 2008 at 9:02 a.m. (Suggest removal)

There is reason to suspect that this was either a self inflicted gun shot or it was an accident. There is no mention of another shooter.

Posted by FedUp on April 15, 2008 at 9:25 a.m. (Suggest removal)

"Investigators determined Monday that another person shot Jaime, but they were not sure if it was deliberate, accidental or criminally negligent, Bonfiglio said."

read the article folks. they know he was shot by someone else.
probably two little upcoming bangers playing with guns in the friends room, and his friend accidentaly shot him. I doubt there was intent, but the fact of the matter is, this little kid was a banger. the person who shot him probably was too. the fact that they believe there is no immediate threat to the public is a joke.

Posted by aroma on April 15, 2008 at 9:34 a.m. (Suggest removal)

The mother was not cluless..."Since he began middle school, Jaime seemed to be getting involved with gangs, his mother said. She said she could tell from the kind of clothes he wore." She knew something was going on.

Posted by Vegas on April 15, 2008 at 9:49 a.m. (Suggest removal)

His mother even says it appeared he was getting into gangs, she could tell by the clothes he wore, at 13 isn't the mother buying him his clothes. So was she allowing him to wear gang attire? Irregardless, I think alot of us parents start seeing changes in our kids, and ignore it as "oh their growing up" I think that this is the time when we should be on them about everything, ask questions, look in their room, rummage through their backpacks, check their cell phones. Why not? They're kids they don't need privacy, they need our guidance and tough love.

Posted by AnnaWhaat on April 15, 2008 at 9:55 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Well I am not making assumptions about gangs. I just want to send my Condolences to the family and friends. God Bless!

Posted by Relvd98 on April 15, 2008 at 10:04 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Vegas

Excellent point; at this early age, they start venturing out and exploring new things. I'm not a mother, but at the age of 13, I'd have control of what's going on in my childs life. Sure, it's a tough job being a parent, but being a huge part of their life is very crucial... getting involved in their everyday life, know what interests them, what they like/dislke, and most importantly, being their friend, would be a huge contributor in making sure they choose the right path.

Posted by Equitable_Enforcer on April 15, 2008 at 10:12 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Lil Vago ... wanderer, traveler or vagabond.

Another teen aged "Lil Vago" was killed in February while riding a bicycle in Buena Park. To see what we are facing in terms of the mentality of the bangers, take a look at the 305 comments posted about the Buena Park shooting.

http://www.topix.net/forum/city/buena...

Did Mrs. Segura know anything about her son's friends? Did she have any control over his activities, day or night? Is there a male adult in the home? The answer to all three may well be no. However, that is no excuse. It is my belief that our government is facilitating the expansion of gang activity by providing crutches to parents ... who can live in America a lifetime while never entering the mainstream. Thus, they and their children are each in different worlds ... which enables the children to pretty much run out of control.

Posted by Mr_Real on April 15, 2008 at 11:08 a.m. (Suggest removal)

I dont get why everyone has to be so quick to judge his life..his life is over! A lost soul we should be praying for his family, unite as a community not start judging. May Jaime rest in peace and may his family feel the love and support they need. God bless him and his family.

Posted by shaver_one on April 15, 2008 at 11:15 a.m. (Suggest removal)

In yesterday's reporting of the incident, RIP_VAGOH wrote (edited for spelling):
" Him and a couple of his guy friends were playing with a gun and forgot to turn the gun timer off and it happened to hit Jaime."
I know David Keith reads these threads. I wonder if he has interviewed RIP_VAGOH. This person seems to have information that would be useful to the Police investigation.
And, I still want to know what a 'gun timer' is. I've been around guns all my life, and I have never heard of that. Or, is RIP_VAGOH just blowing smoke?

Posted by Relvd98 on April 15, 2008 at 11:32 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Lizi

When you said "people", please be specific as to who on here is judging his life. I, for one, did not. His lifestyle was one thing, I do not recall saying he was a bad kid, or that he deserved it. We can all make assumptions here, but the real story is yet to be unfolded.

Shaver_one

I did not read this comment yesterday, but it does make sense...if his friends and him were playing with a gun, well we know the possible outcome.

Once again, I did not intent to offend anyone; I've sent my heartfelt condolences; prayers be with them.

Posted by Equitable_Enforcer on April 15, 2008 at 11:41 a.m. (Suggest removal)

shaver_one, this is under the Sheriff's jurisdiction. Mr. Keith is OPD.

Lizi, nobody is "judging." Jaime had a street moniker, which is pretty well indicative of a gang lifestyle ... along with clothing and other outward signs noted by his mother. It is sad that she didn't intervene. She might well have prevented him from passing from this life on earth in such a senseless manner.

People in El Rio and other areas with gang activity might well adopt a zero tolerance for gangs and develop some intestinal fortitude instead of keeping their heads where the sun don't shine. No more excuses. The fault is not with the cops or the schools ... it is at home.

Posted by Mr_Real on April 15, 2008 at 11:47 a.m. (Suggest removal)

I did not mean each and everyone of you, I know there's a few just trying to give the condolences to the family, good for you!! Honestly what others write has nothing to do with the facts a 13 yr old kid was shot and killed, by accident who knows?? What if that was your son?? Would you like to be reading all this when your mourning the death of your CHILD, aren't we suppose to be adults here? Well how about we star acting like them.
GOOD DAY!

Relvd98..I'm sorry if you took the wrong way, It was not meant for you.

Once again GOD BLESS JAIME && THE SEGURA FAMILY..!!
MY THOUGHTS && PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU

Posted by Robert_Worthley on April 15, 2008 at 11:51 a.m. (Suggest removal)

To any witness to the shooting who would like to remain anonymous but shed some light on what really happened ... go to the web link below. You have a choice of providing the information via a bilingual call center, bilingual input via the web or by text messaging.

http://www.VenturaCountyCrimeStoppers...

If what happened is criminal and your information leads to an arrest ... you will be eligible to receive a reward ... also anonymously.

Posted by Relvd98 on April 15, 2008 at 12:01 p.m. (Suggest removal)

TimeArrow

On a similar note, I did take a look at the teen also nicknamed "Lil vago" that was shot and killed in Buena Park. It's just unbelievable how these gang "bangers" continue to terrorize our society and still brag about it (online?!). I read a few posts and after awhile, I gave up. There were too many saying the same thing over and over; talking about how they were going to kill one another and how their "hood" is the best. I don't doubt that many of them are at their 20's, 30's or even more. What a waste of life.

Posted by FedUp on April 15, 2008 at 12:11 p.m. (Suggest removal)

"unite as a community not start judging"

it is funny that you say this. well, not haha funny. but anyways, so many of these communities that are run by gangs, are very much united. they are united with their own neighborhood, and refuse to assimilate to the outside world. community involvement to them means in their own neighborhood. it has nothing to do with the actual city they live in.
I for one am not surprised that this kid dies like this. his mom knew he was in a gang or hanging out with bangers, yet she did ZERO to help him.

I am sorry he died, but only because he was so young, and had a chance to turn his life around. as for his older homies, they are looking at a similar ending to their lives. chances are though, it will come at the hand of an enemy, as opposed to fellow homie.

Posted by keysersoze on April 15, 2008 at 1:03 p.m. (Suggest removal)

I keep saying the same thing over and over again. Want to solve the problems in Oxnard & Hueneme?? Just raise the rent prices to Thousand Oaks / Santa Barbara / Agoura Hills levels. We'll see the crime rate adjust downward, similar to the ones found in those cities.

Posted by thisiswhatshesaid on April 15, 2008 at 1:05 p.m. (Suggest removal)

All you people who have nuthing better to do but sit here and talk S**T.. need to get on with your lives.. just say a prayer and go.. dont talk badly about someone you dont even know. Unless you do.. go for it.. but if you have nuthing good to say and nuthing else better to do with your lives.. then your just as bad as gang members... Just be glad it wasnt you or someone you know... Love you life and get over petty agruments over the internet.. RIP Jaime and God watch over his beloved family.

Posted by Relvd98 on April 15, 2008 at 2:02 p.m. (Suggest removal)

thisiswhatshesaid

This is what I say...ever heard of public comments?

Posted by aroma on April 15, 2008 at 2:33 p.m. (Suggest removal)

MrCamarillo-- I have been thinking the exact same thing since I first read this story. Yes it is very sad this happened. I don't know if this boy was a gang member of a wannabe, but the way he's said to be dressing he sure did seam to want to be one.

Like I said earlier---The mother was not clueless..."Since he began middle school, Jaime seemed to be getting involved with gangs, his mother said. She said she could tell from the kind of clothes he wore." She could tell by the clothes he wore....yeah since she probably bought it for him. She could have controlled that. My parents did just that with my brother when he was in middle school. He wanted to start dressing like a little gang member, my parents refused...my house, my rules, they told him. They steered him in the right direction instead of saying "Oh he's a teen he'll grow out of it" Parents need to set the example for their kids, and sometimes tough love is needed.

Posted by Equitable_Enforcer on April 15, 2008 at 2:49 p.m. (Suggest removal)

thisiswhatshesaid and SPARKS ... it appears that you are part of the problem. If you should survive into adulthood, emotionally as well as chronologically, please remember that it was folks like the anti-gang posters to this site who worked hard to pay the taxes that gave you the same opportunities as any of us.

I have friends, both Anglo and Hispanic, who grew up in El Rio. They are now cops, fire fighters, teachers, business owners, etc. One of the cops, who was born in Mexico, was a neighbor, and the same age, as your fugitive homie who shot two OPD officers ... and paid with his own life.

Parents ... and choices ... make the difference. Which road will you take?

Posted by Oxnard63 on April 15, 2008 at 3:12 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Very tragic this boy lost his life at such a young age, and we don't know for sure if his mother tried to intervene, but she contradicts herself when she says he was a good boy and respectful of people, then says he was a love only when people were good to him and got into fights at school and reacted when negative things were said to him. This sounds like a troubled kid and it seems to me like she is in denial like a lot parents with troubled kids are. I just don't get the mentality of these type of parents.

I am by no means a perfect parent or have perfect kids, and I do have kids that age but you teach your kids at a young age and set boundries and teach them that there are consequences for misbehavior. You get involved with your kids, you know who their friends are, you talk to them everyday, You don't watch your kid going down the path and just turn your head hoping he'll grow out of it, it doesn't work that way. You put your foot down from the start and you drill it in their heads until it sinks in. I understand you can't be with your kids 24/7 but if you know he is hanging with the wrong crowd, do you continue allowing him to hang out with these kids, no you put a stop to it. I have a relative that went this direction and the problems and reasons for it all come from the lack of proper parenting and teaching this person to take responsibility for their actions and unfortunately it continues as an adult.

Posted by Relvd98 on April 15, 2008 at 3:16 p.m. (Suggest removal)

TimeArrow

Great input! No matter what the article is in reference to, I believe it's the second or third time "thisiswhatshesaid" comes on here and starts bashing on people. Comments begin with, "get a life, move on, leave the family alone, etc". And still has the audacity to tell us we are having "petty arguments".

Posted by Face on April 15, 2008 at 3:17 p.m. (Suggest removal)

If the gun belonged to someone at the house where this child was killed, they should be charged with 2nd degree murder right now regardless if this was an accident/suicide/murder. Owning a handgun and allowing it to get into a child's hands is murderous.

Posted by pjlove10 on April 15, 2008 at 3:28 p.m. (Suggest removal)

SPARKS - Please, the signs are all there. Stop look, listen and pay more attention. Maybe then you'll see beneath the vail of ignorance. Even if this child was not killed in the usual sense of a gang killing, I am more then willing to bet that it was connected to a certain degree. Like I said before, enough arguing, allow people to have opinions. The real truth will reveal itself soon enough. You should focus on what can be done to stop this senseless violence in any form. Get educated and take the path less traveled in life. Don't be a follower. Again, my condolences.

Posted by finnmcgowan on April 15, 2008 at 3:46 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Condolences to the Segura family. What a horrible loss, a young life so full of future and potential. You have our prayers.

Posted by gma_01 on April 15, 2008 at 5:31 p.m. (Suggest removal)

I just read the comments on this issue and it just proves all the hatred and discrimination people have against each other. The important issue here is a young life has ended and instead of using this as a "bashing session" it should be used as a "wake up call" to parents and today's youth if these "bashers" are truly concerned about today's youth, they would be posting comments on all the tragic incidents that have happened (i.e. newbury park teenagers who were in an accident while drinking & driving) but I did not see any. Too bad so many people use their time the wrong way. Like my Father (RIP)taught me "it's not where you live, its how you live" I will say a pray for the Segura family in their time of need, but I will also say a prayer for the compassionless people also. PARENTS, PLEASE TAKE CARE OF YOUR CHILDREN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by sstflyer on April 15, 2008 at 6:57 p.m. (Suggest removal)

"Sometimes he would spend up to an hour ironing his clothes." That's a clue. Kids his age don't iron clothes unless they're a gang banger. They do the same in prison!

Posted by FedUp on April 15, 2008 at 8:39 p.m. (Suggest removal)

"Sometimes he would spend up to an hour ironing his clothes."

good point. homies like their dickies to have that extra "tight" crease in them.

Posted by gma_01 on April 16, 2008 at 9:06 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Fedup & ssflyer: You seem to focus on your own hatred for certain types of people, I am not going to judge you, i am going to give you the benefit of the doubt and think that this young 13 year old did something to you two personally, I truly hope either one of you two have not added to the world's population because that frightens me far more than your interpretation of "homies" I will pray for you both and others like you, but first I will pray for this young 13 year old child.

Posted by FedUp on April 16, 2008 at 9:13 a.m. (Suggest removal)

gma_01 - whatever. you gang banging sympathizers are what is wrong with society. oh, lets pray they dont harm anyone ever again. gang members are all losers. they deserve no ones prayers. let them all rot in hell where they belong.

Posted by Mr_E_Man on April 16, 2008 at 9:32 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Not that it means anything, but I spend about an hour irooning my clothes too, and I'm definitley not a homie.

It's called time management. Iron everything for the week (or at least a couple of days) in advance so that you don't have to do it every day. Been that way since I was a kid.

Great job taking a non-issue and trying to turn it into something else. I guess the trolls do come out at night.

On another note, the article said he "seemed to be getting involved in gangs," not that he was an actual gang member. He was at the age where he could have easily went one way or the other.

And for those of you who didn't grow up in the so-called hop-hop generation, clothes don't make you a gang member. Most young people in hispanic neighborhoods wear similar styles of clothing. Most grown-ups don't know the difference.

Try to remember those beehives and denim jumpsuits you used to wear that your parents were so ambarassed about. Yeah, same thing.

Posted by gma_01 on April 16, 2008 at 1:32 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Fedup - YOU,have just proven what is wrong with society, IGNORANCE AND DISRESPECT towards others!!!! you should be ashamed of yourself and your PARENTS should be ashamed of themselves for not doing their job to raise a civilized human, so what is the difference between you and your parents and the parents of "gang bangers" and the "gang bangers" themselves? NOTHING!!!! I will pray for you because I don't want you to run into those so called "gang bangers" in Hell! I have sympathy for all who suffer no matter who they are. This will be my last comment to you because I truly am FEDUP with you. I hope you find peace in your life that you seem to be without.

Posted by Oxnard63 on April 16, 2008 at 4:05 p.m. (Suggest removal)

This is for gma-01:

I look at Topix News at various Cities and it just amazes me how bad the gang problem is and how they are driving people out of neighborhoods that they have lived in for years. I grew up in Oxnard but would never even think of raising my kids there, it is becoming so ghetto. It is not about hating or discrimination. Is is about thugs that are taking over everywhere you turn around, and killing innocent people, and nothing is done about them. I am sorry but I have to agree with "Fed Up" there is no sympathy for them and they do not deserve respect. Until something happens to an innocent person in your life gma_01 - until then you will not understand and you will continue to support these low lifes that have nothing better to do with their lives and what about the hatred and discrimination the gangs are all about? And don't tell me they are loving people. I grew up with a younger sibling that was in a gang and there is so much hatred and anger and unhappiness and irresponsibility in this person even as an adult. And before you question why I didn't go that path, we were both raised with complete opposite rules.
For Mr_E_Man: The article is about a 13 year old- not a grown man ironing their clothes, and if you spent your time as kid ironing your clothes you obviously did not have a life. There is a difference in the clothes gangs wear and the clothes regular kids wear, fads are one thing, gang attire is another thing. I have to wonder if you are even a parent.

Posted by FedUp on April 16, 2008 at 4:58 p.m. (Suggest removal)

gma_01 - you are obviously the clueless one when it comes to society. I see everyday what gangs do to communities. I may be ignorant of some things that the gangs are involved in, but that is only because I have a little faith left in humanity. I am sure I would be disgusted to know the entire going on's of gang members.

as for being disrespectful? I will gladly disagree with you, and call you the ignorant one. please let me know how any gang member is respectful in todays society? is it with the tagging on public property? is it the drug dealing to yours and my kids in school? is it the random killing of innocents victims? is it the robbing of innocent victims? is it the stealing of cars of those same innocent victims who WORK their butts off to pay for those vehicles?
I guess I should stop now, unless you did not get my point. who again is the disrespectful and ignorant one again? yeah. thats what I thought.

Posted by FedUp on April 16, 2008 at 5:15 p.m. (Suggest removal)

huh? was that the worlds longest text message or something? education is a terrible thing to waste.

Posted by gma_01 on April 16, 2008 at 5:18 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Oxnard63 - I have had an experience with a gang member, but I was on the other end of your story. I lost a loved one who was an innocent bystander, she was shopping at a local mall, but instead of becoming angry and have hatred for the gang member I took the other route just like you did, I researched why there is so much violence and the people that are responsible for the violence and it all comes back to how they are raised by their parents but society has to take some responsiblity for this also whether we like it or not, anger, hatred and prejudice is very contagious (review all the comments) and unfortunately it's everywhere in our society but remember, we become the people we are by HOW we live our lives not WHERE we live. GANGS come in all colors, shapes and sizes so for one person to hold judgment against one particular type is WHY things are the way they are. But I am done, I don't want to lose sight of what this is all about, it's about a tragic accident to a 13 year old child. May he rest in peace.

Posted by thisiswhatshesaid on April 17, 2008 at 10:38 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Dear TimeArrow:

I live and grew up in El Rio, I'm alive today because I chose not to be like people that live in that area... I've succesed in life. Thank you very much, Also coming from the other end of the stick I know how it is to know some one that is jail for murder... so back the hell off. Get a life and remeber this was just a kid that was killed. Not a gang member... a KID!!!! he didn't even get to enjoy life and all that we have to live for. you on the other hand have and it seems to me that it was a useless one. Please stop leaving negative comments. The families will read this and it will saden them more... Please just pray for their families.. Get off the computer and spend your time enjoying the life we have... Get over petty stuff you have no control over. PLUS THE VENTURA COUNTY STAR ONLY REPORTS FALSE NEWS AND CAN NEVER GET THERE STORIES RIGHT NOR TRUE IF THEIR LIFE DEPENDED ON IT!!!!! GOD BLESS THIS CHILD!!!

Posted by freethought on April 17, 2008 at 11:52 a.m. (Suggest removal)

gma_01 - You said, "I am not going to judge you, i am going to give you the benefit of the doubt..."

Before this, you said, "I just read the comments on this issue and it just proves all the hatred and discrimination people have against each other."

Afterwards, you said, "you should be ashamed of yourself and your PARENTS should be ashamed of themselves for not doing their job to raise a civilized human," and "I will pray for you because I don't want you to run into those so called "gang bangers" in Hell!"

So, which is it? Are you or are you not judging here? It looks like you're acting judge AND jury. What happened to those Christain morals you were so proudly flaunting? Maybe, you're playing "religion a la carte" by picking and choosing when you'l live by your religious convictions.

This kid was into banging, and now he's gone forever. Any student and most teachers at Rio Del Valle Middle School know it. Don't fault people for speaking the truth - fault yourself for not being able to control your angry reactions to their statements.

thisiswhatshesaid - Yes, go ahead and keep your head in the sand. Kids his age are involved with gangs. In fact, that's the age gangs try to start new members. It's easier to mold minds at that age, since those kids are so impressionable. And it's not as if gang hangouts have someone at the front door carding for 18 year olds and above. I used to live in Oxnard and was appalled at what I saw and heard coming from elemntary-aged kids, much less teenagers. So, don't give us that, "he's just an innocent kid" line. A 19-year old in South Carolina was given 30 years for murdering his grandparents when he was only 12 because he was "depressed". Some kids are not so sweet and innocent.

SPARKS - ?????????????????????????

Posted by freethought on April 17, 2008 at 12:04 p.m. (Suggest removal)

More for thisiswhatshesaid,

Your statement: "I know how it is to know some one that is jail for murder... so back the hell off."

Angry rant, if I ever heard one.

Your statement: "Get off the computer and spend your time enjoying the life we have..."

Exactly what were you doing when you wrote that? Door-to-door ministries? No, you were in front of a computer. How about practicing what you preach? A response to this comment will simply prove you are a "do as I say, not as I do" individual, but I welcome it.

Your statement: "PLUS THE VENTURA COUNTY STAR ONLY REPORTS FALSE NEWS AND CAN NEVER GET THERE STORIES RIGHT NOR TRUE IF THEIR LIFE DEPENDED ON IT!!!!!"

Although I am not a fan of VC Star's reporting habits, such a statement is completely reckless. To say that the VC Star only reports false news is, in itself, false news. I thought it was against the Christian religion to bear false witness. In fact, I'm not sure what religion allows it (I'm guessing you're religious since you mentioned praying in your comments so many times).

Posted by freethought on April 17, 2008 at 12:09 p.m. (Suggest removal)

TimeArrow - "The fault is not with the cops or the schools ... it is at home."

My goodness, could you have put it any better? It's so simple, yet so many parents will just never get it.

Posted by Relvd98 on April 17, 2008 at 12:23 p.m. (Suggest removal)

freethought

My goodness, you've basically put all the relevant points in perspective regarding "thisiswhatshesaid". When I read his/her comments, I was very hesitant to reply because there was just so much I wanted to say, but then again, it'll become useless even trying; ANY comment directed to this person would be worthless to him/her.

Posted by freethought on April 17, 2008 at 12:47 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Relvd98 - I'm here to help. I agree it's worthless to the individual, but may be insightful to others.

Thanks for the compliment.

Posted by Relvd98 on April 17, 2008 at 1:14 p.m. (Suggest removal)

freethought

No problem; glad to see some people on here speak with common sense.

Posted by 805diva on April 17, 2008 at 3:08 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Its amazing that you all can come on here and talk so negative about this young boy who has lost his live. If you would open your eyes and read the article it does state that, "his death did not appear to be gang related." Dur! And if you are tired of hearing about all these gangs then go out there and make a difference and help some of these kids and prevent them from taking the wrong path. Sitting on your computer posting nonsense comments in this forum isnt going to help any.

Posted by FedUp on April 17, 2008 at 3:47 p.m. (Suggest removal)

805diva - I know for a fact that some people on this particular thread are very much involved with the community in trying to curb all crime. not just gang crime. alot of the comments on here come from people who have experienced gang crime first hand, or have been a victim of gang crime, and are sick and tired of dealing with it.

yes, this kid was only 13, but based on what his own mother was saying, he was heading down a slippery slope. he was at the age where he could go either way. too bad his "parents" were not strong enough to take any action. it sounds like they just sat back and let nature takes its course.

Posted by freethought on April 17, 2008 at 4:21 p.m. (Suggest removal)

805diva - You wrote, "Sitting on your computer posting nonsense comments in this forum isnt going to help any." Right. So, why are you sitting at your computer posting nonsense comments?

TimeArrow eluded to who is in the best position to make a difference - the parents. They didn't in this case, and now the boy is dead. The mother knew he had fallen into bad company, yet he was still allowed to hang around with them.

Maybe this was an accidental shooting, but the boy was into banging, and most kids in the neighborhood and school knew it.

Posted by trendsetter on April 18, 2008 at 1:07 a.m. (Suggest removal)

J.R ( Jaime) was my younger cousin. It sickens me to see these posts and debates on whether its the parents fault/ community. He has a great brother that served for the military. My aunt and uncle are hard workers. They are like you and I--the only difference is they have lost a bundle of joy that filled their hearts with joy.

I was at Kinkos printing all night and getting a few things made for the funeral tomorrow..it made me angry. sad. dissappointed to see his face on the memorial cards. I still cant believe hes gone.

He was 13.

We would appreciate your thoughts and prayers over your judgments in this time of our lives.

Posted by santabarbarasand on April 18, 2008 at 6:20 a.m. (Suggest removal)

So when do we find out where they got the gun? That's what I want to know! Gang banger or not, it's about the gun here and how they got it. They were old enough to know better than to play with a gun but they had access to a loaded one and they did it anyway. I'm not blaming the young man's parents, I'm wondering more about the parents whose home this happened at. What was a gun doing at their home??? Knowing that a group of such young kids had access to one really bothers me.

We hear all the time about young kids playing with guns and getting shot and killed by them. It is a huge issue in our country. There was just an article on msnbc.com about a 2 or 3 year old that shot themselves in the head with a gun. Come on now, how come these kids have access?? Those of you that don't believe in gun control need to help the rest of us to understand why guns shouldn't be more tightly controlled. "Guns don't kill people, people kill people". Yes, true, but people can too easily and mistakingly kill people WITH GUNS. UGH!

Posted by freethought on April 18, 2008 at 6:52 a.m. (Suggest removal)

santabarbarasand - Very good point

Posted by 805diva on April 18, 2008 at 9 a.m. (Suggest removal)

freethought,
yes you are right i am sitting on a computer and i am posting comments. However i am not complaining about the gang violence as you are. If you read my full comment you would notice that it says...if you want the gang violence to stop you should be out there helping these kids choose the right path. You have no right to complain about something if you aren't willing to go out and fix it.
Fedup,
maybe he was heading down the wrong path. Yes, his mom did say she thought he was into gangs, however if you read the article it does state that it WAS NOT GANG RELATED. Isee your point in saying that his parents should have done something instead of just sit back and watch, however some people today arent suited to be parents. Its like my mom always told me, "i dont want anything to happen to you, not everyone can have parents like you that love you and care about you enough to keep track of where you are going and who you are gonna be with."

Also,I have woked at the boys and girls club in my town and everyone of the middle school kids that went there all had nicknames,we had a kid go to the club that everyone would call "chango" because he looked like a monkey. Im not saying that his nickname wasnt gang related but untill they release more information we really dont know for sure that he was in a gang.

Posted by 805diva on April 18, 2008 at 9:02 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Good point santabarbarasand!

Posted by freethought on April 18, 2008 at 12:01 p.m.

(This thread was removed by the site staff.)

Posted by freethought on April 18, 2008 at 12:24 p.m. (Suggest removal)

As for some people not suited to be parents - why the heck are they spitting out carbon copies of themselves? It's common sense, really. If you don't want to take on the challenges of parenthood, don't get pregnant (or make someone else pregnant).

I honestly wish everyone had to pass a government-regulated test and receive a license to bear children. Having kids should not be a right, since real lives are at stake - one of which we lost over the weekend. It should be a privelege - not for the child, but for the parents. However, that ain't reality (except maybe in China), so we have to deal with what is reality. the reality is that anyone with working reproductive organs have the right to populate, and I have the right to complain about it.

Posted by freethought on April 18, 2008 at 12:26 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Edited for grammatical errors:

The reality is that anyone with working reproductive organs has the right to populate, and I hava the right to complain about it.

Posted by freethought on April 18, 2008 at 12:45 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Once again: "hava" = "have"

I need spell check.

Posted by thisiswhatshesaid on April 18, 2008 at 12:58 p.m. (Suggest removal)

I read what i see. I am on here to read the news ( false news from the star) you people are so fast to be negative. I read and responed just like everyone else. I guess you read what i wrote the wrong way. I know kids are in gangs, but DO YOU KNOW this kid personally? No... THe person I was referring to was 18( still a kid and still is to this day) when he was charged, and lived in EL Rio Himslef. So I think I know what goes on... anywho.. just be happy it wasnt you or your own kid. Maybe parents need to learn from others mistakes and get guns out of the house. But either way they will find a gun or something else to do harm. It will never stop. This never ending cycle of gangs. Gangs are here.. we need to releize that. And we need to come up with a plan, but I know frist hand GANGS WILL ALWAYS LIVE where you live... its just life!

LIVE LAUGH LOVE

PEACE

SMOKE SOME

Posted by freethought on April 18, 2008 at 1:05 p.m. (Suggest removal)

thisiswhatshesaid - I am very close to someone who knew this kid personally. That's how I know he was into banging, and was quite proud of himself for it. He was even proud for being arrested last year.
That's a fact that did not find itself into the article.

Posted by thisiswhatshesaid on April 18, 2008 at 2:52 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Okay.. who said anything about it??? I'm not denying anything or saying anything about that. All kids these days are proud to get in TROUBLE... thats how they supposly earn the "stripes" Come on... Open your eyes.. Kids these day have no regard toward anyone not even them selfs... No respect.

Its just too bad a kid had to die over it.

Posted by freethought on April 18, 2008 at 3:37 p.m. (Suggest removal)

No, you are wrong once again. Not all kids are like that (most aren't, in fact), just a large portion of kids in El Rio. I won't make assumptions as to why. I have seen it myself. I used to live in that school district (newer home south of the hospital). Now, I live in Camarillo (since late "06). I don't see any of those problems here. I'm not saying they don't exist, just that it isn't the prevailing situation.

The reason these things happen is because Mom and Dad aren't doing their jobs. It's VERY simple. For you to have an "Oh well, that's life" attitude simply adds to the problem. I don't accept it as normal. In Camarillo and many other cities, it's not considered acceptable. In Oxnard, it's just the norm, because very few want to speak out against it. When they do, people like you say, "Stop whining and do something about it." But they ARE doing something about it by speaking out against it.

You said that it was too bad a kid had to die, but the reality is that he was dead set on being a banger, and now he's just plain dead. Most here won't say it, but they are not thinking, "too bad." He chose this lifestyle and all that came with it.

Don't worry, though. His "homies" will honor him as some sort of hero before venturing out to steal someone's car or rob a liquor store.

If this sounds harsh, that is because I meant it to. I am completely fed up with how "accepting" everyone has become to bad nature and criminal activity. It's too bad that username is already taken.

Posted by Relvd98 on April 18, 2008 at 3:51 p.m. (Suggest removal)

freethought

Once again, you have proven yourself to be a civilized, mature and intelligent individual.

Like you stated, why should they be honored? For who? Point being made: I'm an Oxnard resident who is fed up with these gang bangers...so what did I do? I've taken action; attend the City Hall meetings on Tuesday nights and address the issue and join my neighborhood council in hopes of getting something resolved out of this huge never ending epidemic "gang bangers".

I refuse to move out and let them win.

Posted by freethought on April 18, 2008 at 4:33 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Relvd98 - Thank you. I am glad to know that some people in Oxnard refuse to consider the "banger" lifestyle as acceptable behavior. Oxnard used to be a decent place to live (and Camarillo was considered the "sticks"). It can be again, but will take the kind s of effort you are putting forth. I'm glad you are there fighting the good fight.

Posted by all_american_wrestler2011 on April 18, 2008 at 6:50 p.m. (Suggest removal)

wow, this sucks. i was just talking with this kid on sunday and he's gone just like that. my little brother grew up with him too. he was a real good kid. im going to miss him for years to come.

ps. true story

Posted by ironwoman on April 18, 2008 at 7:18 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Freethought- Even if you are correct in your comments, observations and knowledge of this kid, why don't you have some respect for his family? I don't condone gang behavior. I actually have a zero tolerance level when it comes to gang activity. But when it comes to someone dying, I refrain from judgement. That's not my job.
It's an eye opener for all parents to be cautious of what their kids are doing, who they are associating with, and how they dress and talk. Whatever this kid was doing, he didn't deserve to be killed. His family doesn't deserve the pain of loss and sad times to come.

This week is National Crime Victim's Week. I think we should have some compassion for all crime victims. They deserve to be acknowledged and heard.

Posted by freethought on April 18, 2008 at 9:08 p.m. (Suggest removal)

catlover - Why didn't his parents have respect for the rest of us? They knew he was banging, and did not put a stop to it. Probably wrote it off as a "phase". They also didn't have enough respect for the role of parenthood, and now their son is gone.

As for refraining from judging, that's impossible for anyone. Judging is what keeps us safe. You do it everytime you operate a motor vehicle, for instance. When a driver near you is acting reckless, you make a judgment call and consider that person dangerous. Given your rules, I'd ask you what gives you the right to think that person dangerous? Do you know that driver's history? His or her family? Maybe a spider crawled unexpectedly onto his or her arm. Yet, you decided this person is dangerous behind the wheel. Guess what - you were right to make that call. Judging may not be your job, but you do it every single day, whether you want to admit it or not.

However, this isn't even a case of judging. The boy's actions, behavior, and lack of respect were documented, so let's talk about the respect issue. His parents raised him, and he turned out to be a banger. How can I or anyone respect that? This happens anytime a gang member is killed. Usually, another gang member is involved in some fashion, and all the bleeding hearts and bangers talk about how atrocious it is and how wonderful the boy/man was, saying, "Our little angel was always such a good respectful boy," when we all know it a total fabrication.

On top of that, you lump him in with victims of rape, hate crimes, muggings, and the like. We don't even know if this was a crime. So, until the evidence points in that direction, your last statement is moot.

This forum allows us to talk about these issues and vent our frustrations over the daily crap we see in our community, as long as we follow the rules listed. Anyone out there wishes not to read what we have to say can simply stop reading once they get to the word "Comments" in blue text.

Posted by RIPJS on April 18, 2008 at 9:30 p.m. (Suggest removal)

freethoughts:

I personally knew this little boy since he was in kindergarten. And he was one of the most loving people out there. And as for his parents they were amazing people. His mother was at every school function helped out in class at least once a week and went on every field trip. So don't make assumptions about a womens parenting skills without really know nothing about the Segura family. I came home from his rosary yesturday heartbroken at what people on here are saying. Unless you really knew him don't be so quick to judge you may know someone he knew but stories are always getting fabricated. It breaks my heart to see a 13 year old boy i knew killed and people are trying to say he was a horrible person. Making these assumptions doesn't do anything but make you seem heartless and inconsiderate all i have to say is you not knowing him you missed out on knowing an extraordinary human being who may not have made the best choices but he'll always be remembered to me as that little boy with a radiant smile and eyes that shined for days

Posted by freethought on April 18, 2008 at 11:43 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Dear RIP - It's not my comments that make me seem cruel and heartless, it's yours. I am simply speaking the truth. In doing so, I am hopeful that others won't take the path of this kid. If you read my posts, you'll see that I have plenty of insight on his recent past. Even if I didn't, how much do you need to know about the parents to understand they didn't do near enough to save him. When a kid at the age of 13 starts banging and has an arrest record, then STILL gets into trouble at school (yes, I know all of this happened as well), then I first and foremost blame the parents. He was their responsibility, and yet he continued the banger lifestyle (even had a gang moniker - lil Vago). And when you say that maybe he didn't make all ther best choices, why not just speak the truth? He made all the worst possible choices.

Maybe, you can't see past the image of him when he was only five. Apparently, he changed quite a bit since then. I personally did not say he was a horrible person. I said he chose the wrong path in life. His own mother admitted that much, yet no one intervened. Wore banger clothes, ironed them constantly like bangers do (it was even in his obituary), and had a banger haircut (I'd say see the pic in the paper for yourself, but you know him personally). What I can't understand is why you're not angry about that. Instead, you direct your frustrations at me for stating the truth.

As for judging, see my above posts on why no one should even consider patronizing such comments. We are all judges. That's the simple fact.

Consider me cruel if you must. It won't change the fact that the boy is gone forever, the parents should be blaming themselves, and the gang lifestyle is a stupid choice that always leads to self-destruction.

Posted by RIPJS on April 19, 2008 at 12:20 a.m. (Suggest removal)

I have already wasted too much time on you freethoughts so i just wanna say

R.I.P. Jaime Jr.
you will forever be in the hearts of those who loved and knew you and not what was said about you online.

5/16/1994-4/13/2008

Posted by freethought on April 19, 2008 at 10:56 a.m. (Suggest removal)

mmshoot - The gang banger lifestyle is deviant. That part you got right. Everything else is wrong. I have compassion when it it deserved. People like you were saying the same thing when two police officers open fired and killed a banger a couple of years ago. The banger was the first to fire, and one of the police officers was seriously injured. The dirtbag's obituary read how wonderful and inspiring he was. And many, just like you, bought into it. It absolutely sickens me. You talk about not enough opportunity. That in itself is a complete lie. Lack of choices doesn't drive one to the banger life - wanting to be Mr. Cool does. There are loads of opportunity to succeed - legally - in this country. To say otherwise is just a sign of complete laziness. And none of us should respect laziness, So, if that's your excuse for not doing something good with your life, then you deserve what little you get out of life.

And when you start the name-calling game (calling me stupid) as you did in your post, you lose all credibility. Are you 10 years old? Maybe you're a banger (that would explain your sympathizing and the word "shoot" in your username). Whatever you are, you aren't believable or mature.

Posted by RIPJS on April 19, 2008 at 12:11 p.m. (Suggest removal)

freethoughts

congratulations on making yourself look like a douche yet again. whats that 5 times now?

what are you getting out of doing this??
Do you wanna sway peoples judgments of Jaime?

if you do it obviously isn't working so stop refreshing the page every 5 seconds to try and say another horrible thing about Jaime. His life is done. Hes gone and is never coming back so what are you writing all his stuff for? trying to rally up people who are as heartless as you are to talk about what a horrible person he was? you will never know the real him only what was written about him so it gives you no room to talk about his life like that.

Posted by freethought on April 19, 2008 at 3:02 p.m. (Suggest removal)

RIP - Didn't you say you already wasted enough time on this? Yet, here you are wasting more time (I don't consider my time wasted). As I said before, I know more than you think about this case. I also know you are trying to make an angel out of someone who clearly wasn't. And now, you're joining the other immature posters by calling me names. What exactly does that make you?

You asked, so I'll tell you waht I'm getting out of this: Maybe, just maybe, some parent who's kid is showing the same signs and behaviors this boy did will catch on to what's transpiring in his or her own home and PUT A STOP TO IT. Wouldn't that be worthwhile, or are you another who would rather pretend everything is rosy and go on about your business while another kid continues down the road to self-destruction?

I have to ask you now - why do you resort to lying about me? I never once said Jaime was a horrible person - not once. Go ahead and look. I said he made some pretty stupid choices, and that probably played a large factor in his no longer being with us today. SO, let's get back to the question. Why are YOU now bearing false witness against me? Is that allowable in whatever religion or philosophy you practice?

Posted by palmerda on April 19, 2008 at 3:23 p.m. (Suggest removal)

I saw this boy's picture in the obituaries yesterday. I don't know why they chose that photo. He looked very menacing for a thirteen-year-old.

Posted by palmerda on April 19, 2008 at 3:26 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Pretty sad I must say, but that's where the gang life leads. Hopefully, others will use this terrible incident as a reason for staying out of gangs.

Posted by ironwoman on April 19, 2008 at 7:04 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Response to freethought- He was shot in the head and died...he is a crime victim. This week was National Crime Victims Week...now how is that last statement moot?
Did his parents respect us? I don't know. I don't know them. You apparently think that you do.
Judging- There is a difference between making judgement calls and judging a dead person.
If you can't separate the two, that is your deficiency.

Posted by freethought on April 19, 2008 at 8:23 p.m. (Suggest removal)

mmshoot - "I think, therefore I am." That means I am my thoughts. If you call my thoughts stupid, you are calling me stupid. However, please do not worry about offending me (I do appreciate the apology). I'm a former Marine and have been called much worse in my time, so it would take much more to even phase me. I only bring up the point because your previous comment would hold more power and credibility without that word. People do stupid things, they make stupid decisions, but they themselves are not stupid.

Catlover - So far, there have been no reports as to who pulled the trigger. One of the two rumors floating around is that he was playing Russian Roulette with the two other boys in the room. Of course, he may be a victim of a violent crime, but neither you nor I knows that. That is why your statement is moot - you are lumping him in with other victims before even knowing whether or not he was a victim. ANd you did it simply to make me feel as if I had egg on my face. It didn't work. As for judging, your deficiency is that you seem to think you never do it, but you do - just like the rest of us. I only gave you one example. If I had a few hours, I'd give you dozens more. I have my opinion, and you have yours. My opinion is that the gang lifestyle always leads to self-destruction, and that is what happened to Jaime - whether it was an accident or not. I'm not sure how you cannot see that.

Posted by ironwoman on April 20, 2008 at 8:19 a.m. (Suggest removal)

You just don't get it. Have respect for the dead. That is it. Ignorance.

Posted by santabarbarasand on April 20, 2008 at 8:52 a.m. (Suggest removal)

It is sad how many young deaths we are seeing in the news and it does bring out the full rhealm of emotions doesn't it? Smart parents and educators use these situations as an example to the kids in their lives, plain and simple. It is vital to strive to teach our kids to learn from others mistakes, including our own. We, as adults, have a responsibility to watch for issues, such as gang-banging, in our own children and our friends children and in the kids we teach, and do something about it. In this situation, these kids were obviously given more freedom than they had earned and a disaster happened.

13 years old folks, what were they doing with a gun? We know that the parents likely had to work and weren't able to provide the level of supervision that these kids need and as a working mom myself, I understand that. However, there are TONS of opportunties in our communities these days for kids, especially kids from lower income families. Parents do have a responsibility to make sure that their 13 year old kids are in a safe place after school, supervised and in an environment free from guns. Parents do hold responsibility to make sure that their children aren't allowed to live a ganster lifestyle. Full time workers or not, there is no excuse for it.

The facts as we know them are that a group of kids had a gun and one was shot and killed. If the police feel that he was not the one to fire the gun, they have good reason for it. Ballistics tests would show if he had gun powder residue on his hands, it's easy enough to figure out during their investigation. It doesn't really matter who fired the gun anyways, as all persons there probably share blame for what happened, they had a gun and obviously they were not being safe with it. I want to know who it belonged to, why the kids had access and where the parents were. I want to know how parents can allow kids that young to be left up to their own devices when they live in such a gang populated area.

The boy who died was clearly making bad choices and it is disturbing that his mother stated that he was dressing like a gang member. There is no way that a parent couldn't know the potential ramifications of their child being in a gang. Sure, he was probably a very sweet kid, in front of the adults he knew, but that doesn't carry a lot of weight.

Posted by santabarbarasand on April 20, 2008 at 9 a.m. (Suggest removal)

The theme this month has been "sweet, wonderful, loving" kids that do stupid things, get themselves killed and then end up being "sainted" by people who are sad. Out of RESPECT for the dead we need to use their bad choices as an example to learn from and quit pretending that they were perfect. We are all only human and we all make mistakes...those mistakes are designed to be something to learn from though. If people want to make this boy out to be perfect so that they feel better about his death it will only provide a disservice to the kids who are watching. Don't do that! Accept some of the responsibility that you knew the boy and didn't try to stop him from heading down the wrong road! Make a difference NOW in the lives of the other kids you know who are heading towards his same path and quit trying to pretend these kids are "sweet, perfect, wonderful". They may be all of those things but that doesn't stop them from screwing up their lives!

It is so frustrating that some of you who have already decided that anyone who wants to see lessons learned from this sad situation are heartless. If these people were heartless, they wouldn't be so passionate about the topic. There of course are many views but I am a firm believer that the ones that are passive here, and demanding that the pro-active folks zip their lips, live a passive life with a lot of "looking the other way" when they see trouble instead of making an attempt to help the problem. That's sad.

Catlover, I want to ask you if you feel the boy is a victim of violent crime if he was actually a part of that violent crime? I could see labeling him a crime victim if he were walking down the street and someone drove by and shot him but it makes NO sense whatsoever to label him that way if he and his friends were playing with a loaded gun. Don't victimize him!! Use him as an example of what NOT to do and use him to scare parents into waking up and taking an honest look at their kids!

Posted by Face on April 20, 2008 at 9:10 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Is SPARKS some kind of gangster texter? Are they all truly this ignorant and uneducated. Nevermind, I think this has been answered. "Lil Vago"? I hope the police are talking to this SPARKS character.

Posted by freethought on April 20, 2008 at 10:14 a.m. (Suggest removal)

santabarbarasand - Put better than I ever possibly could. Hear, Hear!

Posted by freethought on April 20, 2008 at 10:33 a.m. (Suggest removal)

mmshoot - Once more to clarify, I am not relying on any rumor at all. I mentioned it simply because it may or may not be true (never said it was true). Therefore, we (you and I) do not know what happened at all. Maybe he was a victim of a violent crime, maybe it was an accident. That's all we have at the moment. Either way, it was the delusion of maturity and coolness that alowed this boy to put himself in harm's way - no matter how you slice it.

To all who keep referring to Jaime as "lil Vago", why are you even daring to call anyone else disrespectful of the dead? The name translates to little vagabond (as pointed out by TimeArrow above). How does that honor this kid's life? How does that pay respects to his family? This is an obvious gang moniker. Just Google it to see for yourself. Do you (Sparks) find this respectful in any way?

Posted by freethought on April 20, 2008 at 10:36 a.m. (Suggest removal)

By the way, the comments monitors should remove SPARKS' comment above. If you can't comment without using that sort of language (even with the asterisks), then you still have about a decade of growing up to do (maybe more).

Posted by freethought on April 20, 2008 at 11:54 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Thank you mmshoot. I may not agree with what you had to say in earlier posts, but it doesn't make your statement any less effective - even to me. In fact, it's our difference of opinions that makes the comments section so interesting and, in some cases, helpful and insightful to other readers (as well as ourselves).

Ditto on SPARKS' comment.

Posted by santabarbarasand on April 20, 2008 at 11:58 a.m. (Suggest removal)

Thanks Freethought, I think that most of us have our hearts in the right places, we just don't always know where to direct the passion. Gang activity has been around for a longgggg time but more and more it makes the news now. Part of that is because of the media and it really is hard to tell what the facts are. There are ALWAYS going to be lots of us commenting because our attention has been brought to the issue so frequently lately. It is an issue and it appears that violence amongst young teens has increased. We CAN help and it starts at home, of course!

It is hard to think you can make a difference when you work full time and have a family of your own but we can. We can teach our own kids to be smart & safe, they watch us closer than we often realize. So do their friends. Gangs evolved to provide a place for "misfits" to fit in, to provide a sense of community and family, and unfortunately, to provide them a sense of safety. They are young and they think it's cool, or trick themselves into believing it, because the alternative may seem lonely and threatening. As adults, we have so many tools to step in before kids get into gangs. There are tons of task forces that have been initiated to help and parents need to really support that. We all think we are doing the best we can until our kid gets into trouble. There is a huge danger in that we delude ourselves by thinking that just because we are doing our best, that they will. Good kids make big mistakes all the time and lives are lost. We give them too much faith, I'm guilty of this with my own teenaged son. He's a great kid with a mostly good head on his shoulders but he made a mistake and a friend lost his life. It woke me up and it woke him up too.

When I speak to the parents, it is coming from personal experience. Not gang stuff and not criminal activity but in the end the result is the same, isn't it?

Posted by freethought on April 20, 2008 at 12:59 p.m. (Suggest removal)

santabarbarasand - Sorry to hear of your son's experience. Yes, in the end, there is no difference. A bad decision is a bad decision, no matter what it might be.

Posted by HavingMySay on April 20, 2008 at 6:19 p.m. (Suggest removal)

freethought - I think you are saying what we are all thinking. It doesn't make their choice any less stupid because they die as a result. It is amazing how many people are willing to ignore the facts because it ended a life and even when they put themselves in that situation. Nice to hear your logic!

Posted by freethought on April 20, 2008 at 6:23 p.m. (Suggest removal)

HavingMySay - Thanks for the wonderful compliment. That is precisely what I'm trying to say (I think you said it better).

Posted by freethought on April 21, 2008 at 12:37 p.m. (Suggest removal)

It looks like SPARKS was finally banned.

Posted by Face on April 21, 2008 at 7:23 p.m. (Suggest removal)

I wonder if the gangster wash money will make it to the family.. I am betting not. A follow up on that would be great.

Posted by NEVERgONNAStOP on April 22, 2008 at 10:23 a.m. (Suggest removal)

ARE yOU SERiOUS ? dO SOME Of yOU PEOP|E NOt hAVE RESPECt. MOSt Of US |OSt A FRiEND. BROtHER. COUSZiN.. WHATEVER hE MAY BE tO yOU. &+ yET yOU hAVE tHA NERVE tO BE ARGUiNG ON hERE AbOUT GANG MEMBERS &+ WHAt NOT.. HONEST|Y SOME OF yOU NEEd tO THiNK BEFORE yOU WRiTE SOMETHiNG BECAUSZE SOME OF US ARE STi|| HURtiNG AbOUT tHiS DEAtH.. :'( &+ A|| yOU GUYS THiNK ABOUT iS ARGUiNG?! |EARN AbOUT tHA WORd [*RESPECt*] &+ tHEN FO||OW iTS MEANiNG..
.
.
.
ANyWAyS JAiME BABy. yOUR GONE [APPEARANCE WiSE.]BUt iN OUR hEARTS yOU STi|| REMAiN. i |OVE yOU &+ MiSS yOU &+ i CANT WAiT tO SEE yOU AGAiN hUNN.<3

Posted by FedUp on April 22, 2008 at 3:28 p.m. (Suggest removal)

I stand corrected from a previous post of mine. this latest one is the worlds longest text message. once again, education is a terrible thing to waste.

Posted by freethought on April 22, 2008 at 3:44 p.m. (Suggest removal)

It looks like SPARKS has returned. Don't know what he/she is saying, since I can't understand text message jibberish yet (lost me when you used a "|" (vertical bar) to spell the word "people"). This sort of effort is kind of like a two-year-old's fingerpainting - only mom and dad can really appreciate it, while the rest of us just see a mess of colors (or words, in this case).

Posted by santabarbarasand on April 22, 2008 at 5:25 p.m. (Suggest removal)

I agree, it's pretty creepy how they wrote the message.

Posted by thisiswhatshesaid on April 24, 2008 at 3:30 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Freethought has nothing better to do then talk Sh**.. get a life.. watch your own self and live your life... stop living so petty...

Posted by freethought on April 29, 2008 at 12:32 p.m. (Suggest removal)

thisiswhatshesaid - You don't like what I said, so you resort to swearing. How un-ladylike of you. Saying things like, "...get a life...stop living petty" shows how angry a person you must be. Yours is a level I refuse to sink to.

By the way, exactly what was it you didn'like? No one knows. You obviuosly don't understand how this little exchange is supposed to work. So let me enlighten you:

One of us comments. The the other either makes a complete stand-alone comment or a remark about the other's comment - either he or she liked it or disagreed with it. That person should probably explain his or her reasoning. The conversation carries on like this, hopefully bringing others into it. That's what makes it both fun and enlightening for all.

However, someone occasionally comes in with disparaging remarks, insults, and/or foul language who seems bent on derailing the entire exchange. Examples of this for this article would be SPARKS (now banned) and, most recently, you. What you don't realize is that the only person being harmed by those remarks is the person issuing them. So, I suggest that you refrain from using them. If you can't make a statement without insulting another commentor or without using bad language, then you really have nothing to say at all.

Posted by freethought on April 29, 2008 at 12:43 p.m. (Suggest removal)

Corrected spelling for the second paragraph of my post above:

"By the way, exactly what was it you didn't like? No one knows. You obviuously don't understand how this little exchange is supposed to work."

Posted by NEVERgONNAStOP on May 1, 2008 at 12:44 p.m. (Suggest removal)

fiRst Of a|| im nOt nO "SPRAKS" &+ yOu peOp|e need tO seRiOus|y stOp judginG OtheR peOp|e withOut nOt even knOeinG them. &+ dOnt tRy &+ judGe me just becausze Of hOw i wRiteee. ughh. im DiSGUSTED in hOw sOme Of yOU guys thinkk.

R.i.P. JAiME.<3
i |OVE yOU.
&+ iM SORRy tHAT
tHERES iGNORANT
pEOP|E ON tHiS.

Posted by freethought on May 1, 2008 at 12:53 p.m. (Suggest removal)

NEVERgONNAStOP - I'm still not sure what you're saying. Can you type English? Either the Queen's English or American English, it doesn't matter.

Posted by NEVERgONNAStOP on May 5, 2008 at 10:02 a.m. (Suggest removal)

freethought-stop reading what i write already. you must not have anything to do if you sit on your computer and go on this all day and just TRY to start something. the only reason i go on this is to read the story about my love not to argue with you or anyone else. i dont have time for you.