Do you see yourself or anyone you know in the following stories? (Names have been changed.) Marsha put the eggs on to boil, and goes upstairs to make the bed. An hour later she smells something funny, like smoke. She suspects the house is on fire and yells to her husband. He goes into the kitchen to discover a horrendous smell and a black-bottomed pan filled with 8 black eggs. Marsha wails,"Oh, no, not again!"Sharon misses her children and feels that she has no purpose in life since they moved out. Her mom calls and asks why Sharon never calls. Her mom talks about her own problems for an hour, and then reminds Sharon to be a good daughter and call tomorrow.

Donna knows she needs to do something with her life. She is afraid to apply for a job; she doesn't have anything to write on her resume, because she was a stay-at-home-mom for twenty years. She is afraid to go to school because her memory isn't what it used to be. Besides, she's 56 and she feels like her life is amost over anyway.

Brenda hurts all over. She's been tested for lupus, fibromyalgia, M.S., and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Tests have been inconclusive. No one takes her seriously because she doesn't have a "real" disease. Yet she knows something is seriously wrong.

Maria has no desire for sex anymore. She suspects her husband is having an affair. She is almost relieved.

Linda was taking care care of her mother as well as working full time and caring for her own family. Shee wants to find her mom an assisted care facility, but her brothers don't want to spend "their inheritance." They tell Linda that she can handle it, but neither one even visit their mom, let alone helps.

Tammy is anemic because her perioods are so heavy. Her doctor wants her to have a D&C, but she is terrified. She suspects it is because she had an abortion 20 years ago, and she is afraid the D&C will bring up the pain of the past.

Sue lay in bed staring at the ceiling. Looking at the clock, she sees that it is 3 a.m. and she hasn't slept all night. Her mind is racing with all she has to do tomorrow at work. She wonders is she is going crazy.

Mary drags herself out of bed by 9 or 10. She is tired by 11 and has to take a nap to get through the afternoon. She showers at 5, before her husband gets home, so he doesn't see her in her pajamas and suspect the truth- that she did nothing all day again. She has no interest in life and just can't seem to get going.

Gail has become a raving lunatic. She yelled at her husband again, but isn't sure why. He threatened to sleep in the other room because he was tired of her complaining, and she fell to her knees and hung on his leg, crying and begging him not to sleep without her. He tells her she had better shape up, or he will ship out!

If any of these stories hit a nerve, you (or someone you love) are probably in midlife crisis, menopause, or a life transition. Who can you talk to about no libido and spotty periods? Your doctor hands you the pill, and you take it for a month. Now you cry nonstop for no reason so you flush it down the toilet. You go to yoga and eat asparagus and blueberries and you still feel awful. Most women go through these experiences and more. You are not alone.If you would like to normalize your feelings by joining with other women, consider joining a support group. You will learn new ways to cope, as well as gain support, friendship, understanding, and acceptance.

Carol Johnson, M.A., is a Marriage and Family Therapist Intern, supervised Susan Tschudi, MFT, License #MFC38762. Carol currentlly facilitates a Women's Support Group on Thursday evenings in Westlake Village. She can be reached at (805) 217-0434.