Q: My parents were married for more than 60 years and now mom is gone. Dad insists on living alone but seems unable to manage his household. I'm sure this is common, but wonder if there is a way to plan for living alone?

A: Yes, it is common. Women generally find that they don't know enough about their finances, and men are not sure about how to perform many household chores.

After many years together, couples work like a single unit and with both participating, the household runs smoothly. No thought is given to what chores each performs until that chore doesn't get done. Then when faced with that chore, would we know how to do it?

Perhaps if we each took some time to observe the little things that our spouses do and learn enough so that if the need arises we could perform that task, then we might be a little better prepared.

It is the little things that make the big difference. Learn how to put gas in the car. Learn how to read labels and buy groceries. Learn how to cook enough to survive. Learn how to do the laundry or run the vacuum. Learn how to pay the bills, balance the checkbook and understand your finances.

Even if the need to do these chores never comes to be, just think how much you will appreciate what your spouse contributes to your smooth-running household.

Q: Lately, it seems like there are more break-ins than ever before. I don't know if there really is a rise in burglaries or that we are much more aware. Whichever it is, it gives me concern about how I might make my home more secure. Do you have any suggestions?

A: I did some research on your question and was surprised how lax many people are about their safety. I was told that more than a third of residential burglaries are not truly break-ins — the home is simply entered through an unlocked window or door.

So for starters, we need to make sure that we use the locks we have in place. There are, however, a number of simple security steps that can be taken to decrease your odds of becoming a victim of burglary.

First, let's talk about doors. All exterior doors, including doors into an attached garage, should be fitted with high security deadbolts in addition to keyed knob sets. If your outside door has a window, the glass should be strong enough to prevent someone from breaking it and reaching the interior locks.

The exterior doors should be solid and door frames in good condition so the doors fit snugly. If you can't view the outside from a nearby window, then the door should have a peephole.

Sliding doors are another problem. The movable panel (the slider) should always be on the inside so that a bar can be placed in the track. A lock placed at the top of the door will add additional security.

Windows should be fitted with good-quality window locks. Sliding windows, like sliding doors, should have a bar placed in the track.

If you have just moved or if you lose a key or your keys are in the possession of someone you don't want to have access to your home, you should have your locks re-keyed. It is a simple process and not too expensive, but a good safety measure.

Now that your locks are in good condition and you have a set of keys that no one else possesses, make sure that you lock up securely every time you leave the house. Also, while you are at home, all outside doors should remain locked. Never hide house keys in a mailbox, planter or under the "Welcome" mat — burglars do know where to look.

Lighting is another way to discourage intruders. Make sure that all entrance areas and yards are well-lit. Turn these lights on whether you are home or away. If you are going out, leave several interior lights on. It will give your home the appearance of being occupied and also you avoid coming into a dark house on your return.

Doors and windows should not be hidden by overgrown shrubbery. Prune it back and remove any tree limbs that would give an intruder access to second-story windows.

Just an added note about not locking doors: Many automobile thefts are also made easy by leaving doors unlocked and, in many cases, with keys still in the ignition. Take the extra second or two to make sure that you have secured your home and car — it takes much longer to sort out the problem once it has occurred.

— Betty Berry is a senior advocate for Senior Concerns. The advocates are at the Goebel Senior Adult Center, 1385 E. Janss Road, Thousand Oaks, CA 91362; or call 495-6250. You are invited to submit questions on senior issues.